Oscars, pt. 4

I see Bob Wuhl's got a new Arliss on HBO. This time, it sounds and looks more like the Daily Show and/or Colbert Report has finally gone to the college campus. Why, there's nothing about it on the IMDb yet! For shame. Guess we'll just have to wait, huh?

Okay, back to the awards. We're up to Costume Design, and I think it's going to be Mrs. Henderson Presents as the winner, for like The Full Monty before it, it's all about the lack of costume design, or in terms the Red States can understand, a celebration of the penultimate Costume Designer: the big guy in the sky! God bless you, Jesus! Besides, how many awards does Colleen Atwood need? She's still pissed 'cuz she didn't work with Burton.

Art Directon. C'mon, Academy! Sooner or later you're going to have to give it up to Harry Potter. Why wait til the last movie? Do it now! OTOH, if King Kong doesn't win, someone's going to be mad. Makes me wonder if Peter Jackson will attend this year.

On to Cinematography, one of my personal favourites, but I don't know why. I'm going to say Wally Pfister of Batman fame, but only because it's more like a Lifetime Achievement Oscar for all his illustrious work with the likes of Gernert Garroni Hippolyte.

Adapted Writing, it'll probably be Brokeback Mountain, because really, it's the writing that's the thing. And it's payback for the passing over of The Shipping News. For some, anyhow. But my money's on the longshot, and that's A History of Violence. The underdog! Besides, everyone else is BTDT. Give the fresh meat a chance.

Writing for the Screen: This is where the payola is the worst in the Academy voting block. There will be groans from the audience when Match Point wins, and Woody's not even there to pick up his ill-gotten Gold. But he did wow the critics, if nothing else, and more importantly Scarlett Johansson who's going to work with him again on his 2006 project! Score!! Screw you, Mia Farrow; start to worry, Soon-Yi.

Directing: You know, what kind of a critic am I? I haven't seen any of the 5 films nominated this year! But from a preliminary glance at the list, I think they're all an affront to the Bush Administration in some way. It won't go to Crash; Million Dollar Baby was a stroke of luck that won't last. Capote? So they watched In Cold Blood. Most of us have. GN 'n GL, I heard it's a little amateurish, but we're putting that aside for the greater good. Munich, I don't know. See Sword of Gideon. War of the Worlds was pretty good, too. It just ain't 1993, Spiely! I guess that leaves BM. I just can't ignore it any longer... which is why I'm picking GN'nGL. Gotta give Clooney something, damn it!

more later. Dang, all this hyperlinking takes forever and a day.