Don't kid yourself, folks! April Fools Day is under attack from, guess who, the usual suspects! But not here, thank goodness. Think of this blog as your April Fools Day Green Zone, if you will. And all this month, we're featuring a special image theme. See if you can guess it. I'll give you a hint: the eyes have it!
Anyway, big big weekend, folks. The entirety of Hollywood is holding their breath as that juggernaut, if you will, is being unleashed on an unsuspecting Red State kinda public. That's right, Basic Instinct 2 is upon us. But what kind of an impact can it possibly have, in this day and age? They seem to have toned down the lesbian theme, if any, which back then seemed a little more potent. Today the USA is a lot more lesbian friendly... friend-bian? Les-dly? See, this is why I don't get paid the big bucks. Someone more talented than myself could combine those two words more effortlessly. But back to the main thread. These days, in the internet age of today, where Basic Instinct 1-type ilk is all over the internet and cable, will this film have the same, if any, impact? Will Sharon Stone's loyal fan base even bother to show up? Who is David Morrissey and how many turned down that part before him? More depressing than that, if this hits big, how many old dusty scripts are Leora Barish and Henry Bean gonna shop around town? So scampish!
What else? Guess that's about all we can do with that for now. Well, there's only one place to go for new movies, and that's Moviefone! And it says there's a movie on the horizon called Adam & Steve. Sorry, Homer Simpson already did that when he became a man of the cloth. "Let's see, who am I doing next, Adam & Steve or Madam 'n Eve?" There's Something about Marrying, yeah! That's the one... Ah, the IMDb expands its ever widening grasp, yet it can't get my hyperlinks right. Well, gotta keep trying. Anyway, This Is Your Moment, Craig Chester. Your moment to shine. Right there in the national spotlight. All your hard work from the days of Swoon has not only finally paid off, but come full circle, and I can only imagine that the latter is the more satisfying. Either way, it won't be a big payday. Better tout it as the new Brokeback Mountain, only without the humor and the production values.
Nah, all quiet on the box office front! I guess the release date for MI3 got pushed back or something. I coulda sworn it was March 30 at some point, but I guess May the 5th is much better, the ol' Cinco de Mayo, gringo! Better wrap this up, it's a little past my bedtime. But before I forget, let me give a shout out to Tommy Lee Jones, currently in negotiations to do the Coens' new pix, No Country for Old Men. Tommy! Trust me, do this picture, whatever the cost. You just did Man of the House. I rest my case. They can just as easily get Billy Bob to do that part if you don't. They're okay, they know Barry Sonnenfeld. You can always call Barry in a pinch!
Just saw a clip of Phat Girlz. I'm gonna have sweet dreams tonight! Biltmore... I love it! :)
p.s. Ah Hah! David Spade, I owe you again. Just saw the Web Ad for Disney's The Wild. Yeah, I liked it the first time, when it was called Madagascar.
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