Thursday, December 07, 2006

It's a nuculear kinda Box Office!


As some of you may have noticed, the Box Office totals tend to get re-adjusted a couple days after they're released. Why this is, I don't know. The battles are very contentious, I guess. So this week let's see how the totals changed over the course of the week, as a new way of looking at the old figures.

At #10 it's Van Wilder 2. It started out having 2.29 million at the box office, but later on ended up having 2.31 million. It gained a whole 0.02 million over the course of a week! Guess all the die-hard fans had class during the week. Or maybe they felt they needed to see the first movie, otherwise they might not understand all the obscure references to the first movie. And to think this was going to be a direct-to-video release! For shame! Right, D-Day?
Hanging tough at #9 it's STF as all the die-hard blogger fans abbreviate it. Its total was adjusted down from 3.4 million to a more precise 3.36 million. It lost my yearly salary! Oh, snap!!
At numero ocho, it's Turistas. (Sorry, that's all the Spanish I know.) At the start of the box office week it had 3.54 mill in the bag, but ended up having 3.58 mill later on. Man, that's some bad hostage negotiatin'.
At Lucky #7 we still got Borat to contend with. Adjusted down to $4.75 mil from $4.83 mil on Sunday, the movie has now made more than Kazakhstan and Tajikistan combined! Didn't see that one coming either, didja?
Santa Claus(e) 3 at #6 just seems like the biggest adjustment, but at this point in my analysis it's probably not. Dropping from 5.01 to 4.89 million it just might get a Christmas boost, just like they were hoping with The Polar Express.

Ah, finally, the Top 5. It feels good to be home again. Sorry, DeVito, your drunken tirade against President Numbnuts didn't help, he's still in office. And to punish you, we're dropping you down from 6.68 million to 6.65 million this week. But hey, it beats doing DVD audio commentary for The Van, am I right?
At #4 it's yet another chip in the Secular Stronghold on the Box Office for the past, oh, let's say 50 years or so. Yes, it's The Nativity Story, and it made a sterling 8.03 million on that glorious Sunday, but as the money-counters took off the rose-colored glasses and subtracted the proverbial 30 pieces of silver, it came to 7.85 million total. Not so heaven-sent, I guess. Incidentally, for all you math dweebs out there, that would mean that each of the 30 pieces of silver are worth $6,000 apiece. That's a lot of silver! And for once, I didn't mis-type it as sliver the first time out, before the spell-checker... actually, that's the kind of thing my not-so-smart spell checker wouldn't catch. It's not a Context Checker as well like the big guns have.
At #3 it's Deja Vu. Didn't I just say that? Starting off with 11 million, it was actually 10.9. Hmm! Kinda like how car dealers say this new luxury sedan is a steal at $49,999.99. I mean, c'mon! Just say it's 50 thousand, because it is. Well, with 8.2% tax it would be $54,099.98 - and that right there is a bonafide Second Shout Out to my fellow effete anti-social anti-people ZPG math nerd loners out there. Not to mention the luxury tax. I thought the Repubes took care of that!
Double sadly, it turns out that Casino Royale's Box Office take stayed the same throughout the week, solidly at 15.1 million, solidly at #2, still right there behind that prissy little bitch called Happy Feet, which was adjusted upward by a full half a million! That's the most yet. And that's probably how things are going to stay for a while, at least until Night at the Museum gets released. That thing's gonna clean up big!
At least Ben Stiller hopes so, I'm sure. Which brings us to the close of another blogging day. ...oh what the hell. I'm too tired to do the hyperlinks this week, but I'm also waiting for the Daily Show to come on so I can tape it. Got 35 more minutes or so. It takes about that long to do, anyway.

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