The Expendables 2

Yeesh... I forgot.  Well, I gotta hand it to Stallone, because the first Expendables film seemed like a better film to me.  To be fair, parts of this first sequel were good, partly because it reminded me of an episode of Locked Up Abroad on the National Geographic channel.  However, I do question their ability to just waltz into China, guns and planes a-blazin'.  For one.  Somehow I think they'd encounter more governmental resistance, but maybe it's just me.  However, and I hate to nitpick, and spoil the surprise at the same time, but there's something about Chuck Norris's "acting" that I had a rather large problem with.  You see, in The Expendables 2, when Chuck Norris reads his lines, he isn't lifting his own performance up.  He pushes the other performances down.  But I suppose it must be a nice break from all those ads he does with Christie Brinkley.
Also, and I'm sure the online community would agree on this, compare the big finales of the two films.  Expendables 1 had an explosive finalé.  The big shootout at the Eastern Bloc airport of Expendables 2 somehow left me wanting.  Just because you can film a whole movie in a warehouse in Bulgaria doesn't mean that you should.  Schwarzenegger should probably stick with just politics from now on.  Also, he's stealing Christopher Walken's hair style!  Cowbell!  What's that all about?
At least Jet Li was able to recuse himself from most of this one.  Also, there was the death of one of the Expendables.  Reminded me of the one kid from Lethal Weapon 3 that got killed.  And on his birthday of all days!  "Happy birthday, kid," said Mel.  Is there any better eulogy speech in the world of these kind of pics?  Probably not.  So in that sense, The Expendables 2 sort of lives up to its name.  Also starring Nan Yu as the semi-love interest.  Basically, they couldn't get Zhang Ziyi.  Oh snap!!!

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-so sayeth The Movie Hooligan