I better do this now or it'll never get done. So, to continue my thoughts about movie posters, let's take Cleaver Family Reunion as an example. Here's a link to its "poster." See, the blue band at the top is usually where the phrase "Blu-Ray" is supposed to go, but alas, not everything makes it to Blu-Ray these days, despite what a trip to a pawn shop might otherwise suggest. Instead it says "HD," which could mean an above-average picture quality on YouTube... which reminds me! I currently have DISH(TM)(R)(C)... sorry for being such a corporate shill and all that. You can skip this part. But they now have a YouTube app or icon that you can select! Sure, it's a bit of a pain in the ass to type in everything with a remote control, but they try to speed it up for you. The point being, you can watch trailers for Cleaver Family Reunion now on your DISH TV! Ain't that neat? Or Meet the Cleavers, it's got both titles.
Also, all these movies have a tag line... a good example of one escapes me at the moment. Of course, the 50s, 60s and 70s had tag lines like "The Most Exciting Time You'll Have At the Theater All Year!" Hokey stuff like that. Here's some for the 1996 classic The Rock. They pretty much write themselves. Here's a WHOLE WEBSITE apparently dedicated to movie tag lines; no search feature, unfortunately. And here's the tagline for Cleaver Family Reunion: "Welcome to crazy. Welcome home." Seemed quaint at the time. Personally, I would've gone with "Home is where the Crazy is" but it's probably already taken, either by Deck the Halls or Surviving Christmas. But it's like they said on the season opener for Season 4 of "Silicon Valley" - a guy sneered at Richard Hendricks "Oh, is it tough becoming a billionaire?" Similarly tough becoming the next... I mean, America's Next Big Tyler Perry. They're trying, though! A lot.
It helps to not be afraid of sequels, of course. I'm just assuming that Holla II answers all of the questions that Holla 1 left unanswered... independent features usually have to. Sadly, Black Horror Movies didn't find the sequel satisfying. I will say that the poster, well... I mean, that's more like a damn movie poster. Cost more than the movie! So worth it. I don't know if I would've gone with the two Ls in "Holla" as lowercase, but whatever. Also, do you really have to say it's H. M. Coakley's Holla II? That's just plain old John Carpenter-style boasting. Now, I know what you're thinking: the poster's just a ripoff of 2006's Slither. Well, you beat me to it, plain and simple. Credit where credit's due.
And so, the struggle continues. Well, Coakley might have to settle for the day job: Unit Production Manager or some such. But he or she is close to the big time. Probably a he. Take a show like "Black Jesus." See? Close to the big time! Now, take further for example, the title of this one episode... maybe not quite the house of, say, Robert Klein's "I Can't Stop My Leg," but maybe on the same street. That's just my particular bias, of course. As a semi-pro critic, you of course have to have such things at your fingertips, your favourite moments of genius, ready to be regurgitated at a moments' notice. Sure, maybe he's milked "I Can't Stop My Leg" for about all it's worth and beyond, but rightfully so, frankly. The other one that comes to mind is Sons of the Desert, when the grieving wives are in the theatre and find out where the boys actually were... I know, I know, I'm an unrepentant snob. I'll see Get Out one of these days, okay? I acutally bought it at Fred Meyer, you know! That and Blade Runner 2084... once these things get into a bankers' box, they're about as good as gone in my house.
Sunday, April 29, 2018
...oh, is that all?
...these reviews take a little longer, because they like to consider the entirety of the heart attack... episode. Plus, there's privacy issues and other legal stuff... probably. The American Association of Cardiovascular and Pulmonary Rehabilitation declared "The best ribcage-to-wheelchair heart operation in a long time. The film and medical communities both have the right to be proud this year." And I as a fan of film am proud as well, and frankly I don't want to live in a world where Kevin Smith isn't crashing comic book conventions and making di... um, jokes about reproductive organs.
But there are raves of other things as well! Comedian Michelle Wolf recently performed at the White House Correspondents Dinner... I confess, I watched it on MSNBC. She, um... dropped an f-bomb or two. I think it was two. The only other thing I remember is when Jimmy Kimmel used the word "a$$#ole," and not even in relation to his production company! No, I think he was talking about Bill Maher. But that's the First Amendment for you. I usually skip ahead to the part with the comedian, but apparently the White House Correspondents' Dinner is sort of an Oscars for the First Amendment. Those Second Amendment celebrations are a little less open to the public... remember Mitch McConnell holding up that shotgun? Children asking "Mommy, why is that man's face mask all twisted like that?" Now, some are complaining about Michelle Wolf's use of obscenities... probably. Maybe not, I just jumped to that conclusion. I probably shouldn't point out that she's the third "Daily Show" alum in a row to be the guest comedian... Plus, she used to work for Bear Stearns, so the investment banking community should be happy with that. They so tend to be underrepresented on TV these days. And for some reason, I keep thinking that Wolf could be the next Sigourney Weaver character in the new Ghostbusters movies... Anyway, these days when it comes to obscenities, I always go back to that big orange one that the Russians put into our White House, with Facebook's help.
And of course, Wolf also blamed the media for creating the Trump "Frankenstein Monster" and all that, as any independent comedian / comedienne would and should. An interesting crowd that attends that dinner; some of the most powerful people in the world, hard to make them laugh. Rob Reiner was there! He's still pretty influential, isn't he? His LBJ is already on DVD at the library! Kinda neat. Sarah Huckabee Sanders sat at the dais, the big table up front... clearly showing more guts than our current Commander in Chief who, even though he's one of the richest people in the world, still has to fundraise a lot. Hey, he's rich, just not Election rich! These things ain't cheap, folks! And the catering... don't even get him started on the catering. I think they're even starting to spit in his fast food now! Ick. You know that's not good when spit is finding its way into fast food. How fast could it be?
But let's get back to what used to be the reason for these weekly posts. The latest installment of the Disney / Marvel Avengers franchise was #1 at the box office, big surprise. Now, the industry bigwigs are thinking... hmm. The 2015 Star Wars made about 280 million its opening weekend. Aren't we a little off this time? Sure, but they still have the right to be proud. Okay, they spent about 600 million to get that 250, but it might not taper off as quickly next weekend! Besides, Black Panther is still out! Isn't that a bit of a conflict of interest? Also, the second biggest movie this week, A Quiet Place, only raked in 10 million dollars, so Marvel / Disney clearly have a much bigger rake. Not bad for a non-Fall season, right? Lotta lawn clippings for Spring! I do kinda wonder what Joss Whedon is up to. It seems he took Sam Raimi's advice and skipped the third installment... but a WWII horror project? Really? Seriously? These small projects in between the big ones, it's a cute idea, but I think you might need to focus on the next big one this time instead!
Sunday, April 22, 2018
Mayochup
But time is finite, and I'm busy scrambling to finish this on a weekday. One more day of work, and it's three days vacation! Yay for me! But the box office never sleeps, and The Quiet Man rises anew to the #1 spot... I'm sorry, my intern's telling me that it's actually the 1080p, 4K digital transfer from flammable nitrate stock of the 1985 classic The Quiet Earth starring Bruno Lawrence and Alison Routledge... I think I went to high school with her brother! We were in band and... sorry, wrong again. I want to say it's The Brave One but that came out in 2007. A seemingly more enlightened era, especially when the plot involves the white woman shooting the black cop twice... you know, so she can make a getaway, and the cop can say "Dude! She SHOT me!" or whoever. It's that old BCAGIF rule... you know, the Black Cop Always Gets It First.
Okay, stay focused here... it's called A Quiet Place. Whew! Nailed it finally. Bing! I mean, co-stars and married couple Emily Blunt and John Krasinski are probably guaranteed work in Hollywood for life in general... but a hit like this doesn't hurt either. I mean, she's the new Mary Poppins, he got jacked for that Michael Bay Benghazi movie. Great excuse to stay in shape, that Hollywood. I haven't seen a battle for first place like this since Forrest Gump and True Lies were trading places for a few weeks there back in 1994... I'm dating myself again. Well, what can me say? We pine for the box office battles of our adolescence, because I used to be with it. Then, they changed what it was... sorry, more Simpsons quotes again.
Anyway, let's devote some quality time to the debuts this week. Got three, you know! First, the latest Amy Schumer vehicle. This one's called I Feel Pretty. Oh so pretty. Pretty and busy, too! Isn't she still working on her Comedy Central show and all? And shepherding the next generation of comedians under her giant wings? That's where the real gravy is, of course, if only as a stand-up comedian. Let's just not try to have any more Rodney Dangerfield shepherding Sam Kinison-type deals, please. Meantime, thank you for your service, Amy... seriously? She was in that? Never too early to try for an Oscar, I guess.
Our second debut this week marks the return of "Broken Lizard" and their celluloid offering Super Troopers 2... I am not a fan. Our THIRD debut this week is a film called Traffik... no, not a 4K, 1080p transfer of that old series "Traffik" upon which the 2000 Steven Soderbergh film is based. No, this is more of that old Straw Dogs magic, if the plot description is to be believed. Less extreme than, say, Derailed, which is nothing if not the Hollywood nightmare. The perfect couple, Jennifer Aniston and a British guy, are attacked by some vaguely ethnic thugs straight from Central Casting. This time, it's Paula Patton rocking the beach body, post-Thicke breakup, who's probably the victim. And what did the American movie-attending public say to that? Well, they said, "We'll go to see it, but we've got eight movies to see before that happens." Well, you gotta reach for the stars and or Oscar gold like that sometimes, and risk depressing the sh... oe leather out of people to do it.
...guess that's all the witty-ish observations I have for now. Gotta get ready for "The Daily Show" again.
Sunday, April 15, 2018
Auteur Watch - Bill Gunn
What to say about Bill Gunn? I mean, other than a bad pun like "Well, he's still firing away, even after his passing in 1989..." So tasteless. Welp, you gotta give the guy credit. I mean, sure, he had a little bit of luck at the start of the '60s, being in shows like "The Man from U.N.C.L.E." and what not. Something about those James Bond-type shows that were big back then. There were other shows to be sure, like "Route 66" and a "Tarzan" TV show that lasted two, count 'em... TWO seasons!
But then, the 'X' rating went mainstream, more or less... historians may never know when the 'X' rating became an official thing. I can't put my finger on it... or in it, either. I'd have to at least wash my hands afterwards. Love that joke. But Bill couldn't resist, and so we have his directorial debut called Stop. One of those things filmed over a weekend, probably about sex... sure, Bill had the script in his desk all along, ready to go in the event of a seismic shift in cultural morays about the first of the big three... you know, sex, drugs and Rock 'n Roll. I guess they go in order of appearance. And, of course, with such songs as Ke$ha's "Your Love is My Drug," they're now trying to combine sex and drugs into one thing... drex? Suggs? Is a list of three things too complicated these days?
Well, after 1970's Stop, Gunn took his own advice and moved to more R-rated fare, starting with 1973's Ganja & Hess. One of those titles that, sadly, hasn't yet floated to the top of the list of such titles. I mean, there's Homer and Eddie, of course... like I need to tell you. Oh, James Belushi wasn't acting in that one; that's just the way he is. Then, of course, there's "Starsky and Hutch" which Gunn might have been a part of! You got your "Tequila and Bonetti"s, your O. C. and Stiggs, your "T Bone N Weasel"s, what have you, and round and round we go.
Work for him kinda slowed down in the 80s... a lot. But he did get a recurring role on... some TV show that we can't talk about anymore. We just can't. And then, as all who buy a ticket for this crazy ride, it came to an end, and it was time to go to that big director's chair in the sky. A chance to point a camera into the clouds and tell the angels where to sit with their harps. For Bill Gunn, this was in 1989 in Nyack, New York... a town so nice, they sort of named it twice. Couldn't do it completely due to copyright infringement issues, of course. But in Hollywood, death is sometimes never quite the end. Take Turner Classic Movies, for one! Unless you're one of those people who get depressed by old, black and white movies. Apparently, someone else went through Gunn's desk at one point to see if there was a good screenplay in there. And they found a whole movie, in fact! Well... on old video tape, anyway. But he learned to keep the camera real still, and not move it too much in really bright light... and 38 odd years later, here it is, ready to be judged by a mostly forgiving world. It's called Personal Foul... no, wait, that's that Rockford thing. No, Gunn's is called Personal Problems. And it's apparently as current today as it was back then. I understand Lars von Trier's already planning on doing a remake of sorts. Just as long as he doesn't have to follow any of that Dogme 95 bulls... stuff. What a stupid idea that was!
In other Bill Gunn reincarnation news, I'm told by the IMDb that Spike Lee is currently making a Bill Gunn script into a new movie... oh, I guess it already happened. Instead of calling it Ganja & Hess, however, Spike's new joint is called Da Sweet Blood of Jesus. The plot sounds a little similar to Ganja & Hess. You can read about it here yourself. I was struck by the seeming contradiction in terms, however. It says "Dr. Hess Green becomes cursed by a mysterious ancient African artifact and is overwhelmed with a newfound thirst for blood. He however is not a vampire." I guess that is why you need to see the movie. If you have a newfound thirst for blood... how are you not a vampire? Maybe it's a Masons thing. I mean, Dracula must have been grandfathered in a long time ago with a Thirst for Blood contract or something. And then you might ask yourself... just what makes a vampire, anyway? Is it the cape? The fangs? The need to stay out of the sunlight, or to sleep in a coffin on a bed of the soil from your native land? You know, so all the mycelium in your back will have something to munch on during the night? Maybe the guy's just a zombie. Okay, zombies only eat brains, sure... but maybe it's just for the blood in the brains? Maybe brain blood has more oxygen in it than your garden variety blood or something. So many questions... anyway, a toast to Bill Gunn for cheating death a little bit. Bill Shakespeare, eat your heart out!
But then, the 'X' rating went mainstream, more or less... historians may never know when the 'X' rating became an official thing. I can't put my finger on it... or in it, either. I'd have to at least wash my hands afterwards. Love that joke. But Bill couldn't resist, and so we have his directorial debut called Stop. One of those things filmed over a weekend, probably about sex... sure, Bill had the script in his desk all along, ready to go in the event of a seismic shift in cultural morays about the first of the big three... you know, sex, drugs and Rock 'n Roll. I guess they go in order of appearance. And, of course, with such songs as Ke$ha's "Your Love is My Drug," they're now trying to combine sex and drugs into one thing... drex? Suggs? Is a list of three things too complicated these days?
Well, after 1970's Stop, Gunn took his own advice and moved to more R-rated fare, starting with 1973's Ganja & Hess. One of those titles that, sadly, hasn't yet floated to the top of the list of such titles. I mean, there's Homer and Eddie, of course... like I need to tell you. Oh, James Belushi wasn't acting in that one; that's just the way he is. Then, of course, there's "Starsky and Hutch" which Gunn might have been a part of! You got your "Tequila and Bonetti"s, your O. C. and Stiggs, your "T Bone N Weasel"s, what have you, and round and round we go.
Work for him kinda slowed down in the 80s... a lot. But he did get a recurring role on... some TV show that we can't talk about anymore. We just can't. And then, as all who buy a ticket for this crazy ride, it came to an end, and it was time to go to that big director's chair in the sky. A chance to point a camera into the clouds and tell the angels where to sit with their harps. For Bill Gunn, this was in 1989 in Nyack, New York... a town so nice, they sort of named it twice. Couldn't do it completely due to copyright infringement issues, of course. But in Hollywood, death is sometimes never quite the end. Take Turner Classic Movies, for one! Unless you're one of those people who get depressed by old, black and white movies. Apparently, someone else went through Gunn's desk at one point to see if there was a good screenplay in there. And they found a whole movie, in fact! Well... on old video tape, anyway. But he learned to keep the camera real still, and not move it too much in really bright light... and 38 odd years later, here it is, ready to be judged by a mostly forgiving world. It's called Personal Foul... no, wait, that's that Rockford thing. No, Gunn's is called Personal Problems. And it's apparently as current today as it was back then. I understand Lars von Trier's already planning on doing a remake of sorts. Just as long as he doesn't have to follow any of that Dogme 95 bulls... stuff. What a stupid idea that was!
In other Bill Gunn reincarnation news, I'm told by the IMDb that Spike Lee is currently making a Bill Gunn script into a new movie... oh, I guess it already happened. Instead of calling it Ganja & Hess, however, Spike's new joint is called Da Sweet Blood of Jesus. The plot sounds a little similar to Ganja & Hess. You can read about it here yourself. I was struck by the seeming contradiction in terms, however. It says "Dr. Hess Green becomes cursed by a mysterious ancient African artifact and is overwhelmed with a newfound thirst for blood. He however is not a vampire." I guess that is why you need to see the movie. If you have a newfound thirst for blood... how are you not a vampire? Maybe it's a Masons thing. I mean, Dracula must have been grandfathered in a long time ago with a Thirst for Blood contract or something. And then you might ask yourself... just what makes a vampire, anyway? Is it the cape? The fangs? The need to stay out of the sunlight, or to sleep in a coffin on a bed of the soil from your native land? You know, so all the mycelium in your back will have something to munch on during the night? Maybe the guy's just a zombie. Okay, zombies only eat brains, sure... but maybe it's just for the blood in the brains? Maybe brain blood has more oxygen in it than your garden variety blood or something. So many questions... anyway, a toast to Bill Gunn for cheating death a little bit. Bill Shakespeare, eat your heart out!
Ready Player One
Anyway, you just know a movie's going to be a hit when one of your customers tells you that their kid is going to see it, which is what happened to me this weekend in regards to the latest Dwayne Johnson vehicle called Rampage. Sadly, they didn't realize that it's based on an '80s video game, but they did helpfully explain that last season's Jumanji reboot is! Oh well. See, people around here ski topless while smoking dope, so irony's not really a high priority. We haven't had irony here since about '83, and seeing as how I was the only practitioner of it I stopped because I was tired of being stared at. But when you're in the Dwayne Johnson business like director Brad Peyton is, you kinda don't want to not be. Sometimes you just gotta put that dream on hold about making the $100 million epic about the train wreck in the coal mine... incidentally, did that actually ever really happen? Seems like no engineer with any sense of what works and what doesn't would ever try to do that.
The only other debut this week is a 1080p, 4K restoration re-release of that classic Madonna pic Truth or Dare... I'm sorry, it's actually a new pic of the same name, starring Lucy Hale. You might remember her from the show "Pretty Little Liars" where she starred as one of the liars. Wow! They seem to have all seasons of it at my local library! I'm tempted. She caught my eye because she kinda looks like Barbara Kean of "Gotham" fame. And if you look at the pic I was looking at, in the upper left hand corner we have an Estelle Warren-type. It seems to be Sasha Pieterse, who plays a character named Dino de Laurentiis... I'm sorry, that's Alison DiLaurentis. I always get those two mixed up.
Meanwhile, back at the lab, in political news, Michael Cohen is currently in the hot seat, the proverbial eye of Sauron fixed upon him this week. And I hate to use an overused cliché, but SNL did indeed hella crush it yesterday with the Meet the Parents reunion of Robert De Niro as Robert Mueller, and Ben Stiller as Michael Cohen. I don't know off the top to what percentage point their dialogue was exactly the same as the same scene in said Meet the Parents, but it was probably pretty close to 100. And for any of you in the lamestream media who come across this, do me a personal favor, will ya? Would you please start referring to Michael Cohen as "Mickey"? It would make him personally feel better, for one. Sure, not as good as that "60 Minutes" story about Harvard's influence on comedy writing, but pretty better. Allow me to take this time to recap... see, there's a comedy magazine that everyone who wants to be someone in modern day comedy writing tries to get into. The Harvard Lampoon, I believe it is. Many graduates in places of high esteem who remember the secret handshake, many people currently in the program who have guaranteed employment and high fees on the lecture circuit in their guaranteed futures. No Horatio Algers from Brown or Dartmouth here anymore, folks. You wanna get into that national spotlight these days, you gotta have one foot in showbiz already. They say they want diversity, and they say they want points of view from all corners of the globe... but at the end of the day, it's all about who's already got theirs. They're writers! They can approximate what one of the unwashed masses is thinking. Close enough. Anyway, back to the instant case. One of the traditions of this Harvard comedy magazine, and seeing as how it's Harvard, it's rife with traditions... one of the traditions is pranks. And the "60 Minutes" story informed us that a recent prank just might be the prank to end all pranks, or at least set the bar impossibly high. They pranked Donald Trump into thinking that he was doing a legitimate story, and not for a comedy magazine, and they dragged the Harvard wooden chair to Trump Tower for a photo-op and all that. After the dust settled, and Trump found out that he was the butt of a rather elaborate joke, he had Mickey Cohen on the phone that afternoon reading the Cohen/Trump Riot Act to one of the members of the Harvard comedy magazine. The usual stuff, you know: Cohen saying that what he was going to do to this 20 year old kid in court was going to be "disgusting," what have you. Then Cohen tells the kid to send him his Harvard I.D. "60 Minutes" interviewed the scared kid, and the kid said that he actually did it! In this era of Adobe Photoshop, he actually did it! Nothing came of any of Cohen's, and by association, Trump's, bluster and or vague threats of litigation, but when Cohen did see the story, and heard of how scared the kid was, he said to himself "...oh, thank God! Still got it." That was last Sunday. The next day, the shoe kinda dropped on Cohen. Bigly. The moral of this Aesop's fable? I think it's that you don't pick on Harvard. You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but don't pick on Harvard. Just don't do it. Especially if you're Mickey Cohen. No. Don't do it.
So what else is going on? Well, this came across my virtual desk, so to speak. In case you don't want to click the link, the headline is that New England's biggest GOP donor is funding a Democrat. Which would certainly be strange in most other times in history, but I think I see where this GOP donor is coming from. He or she would just like to fund a candidate that stands for traditional family values... not whatever the hell is coming out of the White House these days. I mean, Trump's got a secret other family too? I mean, with Schwarzenegger, sure... I could see that. But Trump? Hmm. I wonder if it was the best sex he ever had a second time or not. I could see why he wouldn't want to brag, though. I mean, when you're going for the highest elected office in the known universe, "Having Secret Other Family" is not exactly in the Constitution, know what I mean? "Over 35" is, but not that other one. Ick. I gotta go try to wash off the (orange) grime now.
Sunday, April 08, 2018
Auteur Watch - Desmond Gumbs
But poster or no poster, Gumbs hasn't given up on the industry and taking time off to raise a family yet. No sir. Sure, he's given up on the silver screen, but you know what? These days, your HD TV with 4k, 1080p, Dolby 5.1 Surround Sound is the new silver screen, and he's got some big things lined up. First, there's "Dual Arrangements." ...well, that's not the main one, really. No, the two big main ones are of course "Girl Power" which, of course, speaks as loudly as possible to such current things as the #MeToo movement, etc. For the Tyler Perry / Kirk Cameron demographic, there's "Church." And so, a toast to Desmond Gumbs! Sucks to still be scrambling around to make it when you're past 40, don't it? Welcome to the world.
Auteur Watch: John Krasinski
But I lose track again. Probably for good reason, because I don't remember searching past any commercials for A Quiet Place during my usual TV shows. You know, "The Daily Show", "Gotham", what have you... so let me be the first to say it. Oscar(R) (C) (TM) nom for the cinematographer? I mean, the visual aspect's kinda important for a movie that makes 50 million domestic the first weekend, right? But I think I know why Krasinski made the bold leap into the directors' chair. He probably got tired of his street cred of being too much like the character he played on "The Office" and what not. And after doing that movie with Michael Bay, he took one long, hard look at that guy after doing his special workout for the role... I did a similar job for a while not too long ago. Apparently the workout involves pushing heavy wheeled stuff around a lot, and probably not eating carbs. Well, one day he was feeling a little rubbery and Bay stopped by and he thought... ugh. Well, if that handsome-ish bastard can direct, well... hey! Why not me? John Krasinski? I'm a big dumb white guy too! And so, the pet project with his wife was bourne. Yes, many a Hollywood marriage has been ruined over such a vanity project... the only one I can think of off the top is 1990's Paradise... dayamn, but I'm dating myself again, aren't I? They showed probably the best part on TV when that "Miami Vice" dude was trashing the place. Can't un-remember that, apparently. Or hey! What about Cleopatra that I just checked out from the library? If only there were some sort of database where you could set the parameters so finely: husband and wife starring in a pic, with one of them directing... something that people have ACTUALLY HEARD OF. There's probably all kinds of YouTube 6 minute shorts that fit the bill... ooh! How about that home video of the wife with her hair stuck in the dishwasher, and the husband's just filming... sorry, VIDEOTAPING it... another 80s classic, but better use Safe Mode when Googling it.
But Krasinski can't badmouth Bay too much... Bay was one of the producers. Well, that's one way to keep funding your little TransFormers movies! On to the next debut called Blockers. Here's the plot description: "Three parents try to stop their daughters from having sex on Prom Night." I've been out of high school damn near 30 years now. About time for my dad to pressure me anew into going to that reunion. Now I'm no arch-Conservative, mind you, but I think I'm on the parents' side on this one. Of course, the film might be as well. But there's three girls, apparently, vying for a cinematic deflowering, which probably means that one of them actually will... the hottest one, of course. And so the film will have to console this deflowered young maiden. Can't be too proud of the fact, right? Time for a not-so-sleazy variation on Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Maybe a road trip to an abortion-friendly state? I'm also torn because "The Daily Show"'s Ronnie Chieng did a piece to help promote Blockers. Unfortunately, the piece was about that fad called... hoh boy... we don't need a Spoiler Alert here, we need a Gross Alert... that fad called "Butt Chugging." Why, it's right there in the capital letter B, ain't it? It's the practice of filling your body with alcohol, but rectally! ...see how I did that? And judging from the clip of John Cena that I saw, you don't even have to stand upside down anymore! But your grandfather will tell you all about it anyway. "I used to go out to the pub, wear my formal Butt Chugging thong, and stand on my head for a half hour straight while they poured mug after frosty mug down the ol' Hershey highway! You know, it used to be that mass consumption of alcohol would wrinkle your face somethin' awful! But when you drink through your ass instead, the wrinkles instead just go right to your duodenum and what not! Your face doesn't age, but good luck finding a comfy chair anymore!"
Okay, let's move on to the next. Our last debut is Wes Anderson's latest. It says it's been out for three weeks already, but it's still a debut of sorts. Apparently, his publicist said that Wes had such a good time making Fantastic Mr. Fox, that it was time to revisit that one as he plans the next 20 years of his career. It's called Isle of Dogs, and he came up with the idea after watching Letters from Iwo Jima... something like that. Or maybe it was after watching a PBS special on YouTube about Japan's famous cat island. What, are dogs chopped liver all of a sudden? Time to rectify that imbalance in the ongoing battle between cats and dogs.
Sunday, April 01, 2018
Auteur Watch - Robert Guillaume
Everybody wants to direct. Yes, even Benson. Now, these days anyone who can start a showbiz career in their 40s is a hero of mine, but this was not always the case. Mostly because I was younger. But I kinda never really got into his stuff before, nor was I peer pressured into doing so. Yet another reason why I never got anywhere in this life... got, currently getting, will get in the future, etc. Well, we're past tents at this point. But you know what? Neither did Robert Guillaume himself! One minute, he's TV's biggest star, the next he's understudying the lead in "The Phantom of the Opera." Doing both much?
Clearly he won the sit-com game in the 80s, even going so far as to get a sitcom called "http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096692/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_72... sorry, that's the hyperlink to it. I mean, the sticom's ... sitcom's called "The Robert Guillaume Show." Well, we were more tolerant of the French back then. Hey, at least they weren't nuke-crazy Reds. They just tested a few nukes on low-population areas like Tahiti, you know. Unfortunately, the self-titled show just didn't have legs. You know how hard it is for someone to get a show named after themselves? Tom Arnold tried and tried, but he had to settle for one alias after another! Take "The Jackie Thomas Show," for example... no, seriously. Take it, and then burn it. No one wants to see that... except the one with Chris Farley. That one episode belongs in the Library of Congress. Still, I can't help but wonder what went wrong with "The Bob G. Show." Maybe the plot description will help: it says "To date, the only American series whose plot revolves around the growing romantic relationship between an African-American man and (a) Caucasian woman." ...okay, that explains a little. Well, we're a little less tolerant of that sort of thing. It causes enough problems in real life, let alone on our television screens.
But after working with the best directors that Hollywood has to offer... Jay Sandrich, Paul Bogart, J. D. Lobue, what have you... the list goes on and on... well, like any actor worth his weight in jelly beans will do, Guillaume looked at these people and thought to himself "Well, HELL! If those idiots can hold the most powerful position on a set, so can I, damn it... so can I." But Guillaume is picky, as his résumé illustrates. Not so picky as to be out of work, mind you, but picky. Like George Harrison fussing over his first solo album, Guillaume's directorial debut has to be great.
Really great.
Really REALLY great.
And great it was... wasn't it? If only on paper. Who could go wrong with a modern-day adaptation of an old classic? And so, something called "John Grin's Christmas" was born... don't let the title fool you! Seriously, they said that in the TV ads for it... probably. Or at least illustrated it. It's an adaptation of Charles Dickens' tale that our society has deemed immortal: "A Christmas Carol." ...well, one of them, anyway. He was kinda the Stephen King of his day, at least when he got popular, and without the gore and bad jokes. A Christmas Carol is definitely #1 when it comes to remakes. David Copperfield, A Tale of Two Cities, Great Expectations, Good Expectations, Fair Expectations 2: Expectation Boogaloo, The Pinkerton Diaries, The Redundant Dithyrambic Downfall and Public Flogging of Pennypinscher McGrabbass... not remade as much as the one about Christmas. All beloved classes, and staples of comparative literature classes everywhere, but not remade as much. Maybe because they were done so well in 1940, who knows. Another reason I got nowhere in life: no Comp. Lit classes.
But before I have to relieve myself because of all the Sunday tea I have, let me just observe that "John Grin's Christmas" was Robert Guillaume's one and only directorial credit, which nevertheless qualifies him for my Auteur Watch segment. He also played the lead in said directorial debut. But of course, right? Visions of Citizen Kane swirling thorough through his head, no doubt. But when the last day of shooting wrapped, I think Guillaume said, either to just himself or to the cast and crew gathered around him awaiting instruction, "I'M A CELEBRITY, GET ME OUT OF HERE." Thereby shafting him of future residuals from that title. And second, he said, either just in his head or to all within shouting distance... well, first he pointed to that stupid folding chair that directors sit in, that nevertheless bring fear, envy and reviling to all who work around one, especially if there's a name on the back of it... Guillaume pointed to his chair on "John Grin's Christmas" and said, at the top of his Juilliard-trained lungs "I NEVER WANT TO SEE ONE OF THOSE EVER AGAIN."
And never again he did... something like that. Well, never sat in one again, anywho.
Clearly he won the sit-com game in the 80s, even going so far as to get a sitcom called "http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096692/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_72... sorry, that's the hyperlink to it. I mean, the sticom's ... sitcom's called "The Robert Guillaume Show." Well, we were more tolerant of the French back then. Hey, at least they weren't nuke-crazy Reds. They just tested a few nukes on low-population areas like Tahiti, you know. Unfortunately, the self-titled show just didn't have legs. You know how hard it is for someone to get a show named after themselves? Tom Arnold tried and tried, but he had to settle for one alias after another! Take "The Jackie Thomas Show," for example... no, seriously. Take it, and then burn it. No one wants to see that... except the one with Chris Farley. That one episode belongs in the Library of Congress. Still, I can't help but wonder what went wrong with "The Bob G. Show." Maybe the plot description will help: it says "To date, the only American series whose plot revolves around the growing romantic relationship between an African-American man and (a) Caucasian woman." ...okay, that explains a little. Well, we're a little less tolerant of that sort of thing. It causes enough problems in real life, let alone on our television screens.
But after working with the best directors that Hollywood has to offer... Jay Sandrich, Paul Bogart, J. D. Lobue, what have you... the list goes on and on... well, like any actor worth his weight in jelly beans will do, Guillaume looked at these people and thought to himself "Well, HELL! If those idiots can hold the most powerful position on a set, so can I, damn it... so can I." But Guillaume is picky, as his résumé illustrates. Not so picky as to be out of work, mind you, but picky. Like George Harrison fussing over his first solo album, Guillaume's directorial debut has to be great.
Really great.
Really REALLY great.
And great it was... wasn't it? If only on paper. Who could go wrong with a modern-day adaptation of an old classic? And so, something called "John Grin's Christmas" was born... don't let the title fool you! Seriously, they said that in the TV ads for it... probably. Or at least illustrated it. It's an adaptation of Charles Dickens' tale that our society has deemed immortal: "A Christmas Carol." ...well, one of them, anyway. He was kinda the Stephen King of his day, at least when he got popular, and without the gore and bad jokes. A Christmas Carol is definitely #1 when it comes to remakes. David Copperfield, A Tale of Two Cities, Great Expectations, Good Expectations, Fair Expectations 2: Expectation Boogaloo, The Pinkerton Diaries, The Redundant Dithyrambic Downfall and Public Flogging of Pennypinscher McGrabbass... not remade as much as the one about Christmas. All beloved classes, and staples of comparative literature classes everywhere, but not remade as much. Maybe because they were done so well in 1940, who knows. Another reason I got nowhere in life: no Comp. Lit classes.
But before I have to relieve myself because of all the Sunday tea I have, let me just observe that "John Grin's Christmas" was Robert Guillaume's one and only directorial credit, which nevertheless qualifies him for my Auteur Watch segment. He also played the lead in said directorial debut. But of course, right? Visions of Citizen Kane swirling thorough through his head, no doubt. But when the last day of shooting wrapped, I think Guillaume said, either to just himself or to the cast and crew gathered around him awaiting instruction, "I'M A CELEBRITY, GET ME OUT OF HERE." Thereby shafting him of future residuals from that title. And second, he said, either just in his head or to all within shouting distance... well, first he pointed to that stupid folding chair that directors sit in, that nevertheless bring fear, envy and reviling to all who work around one, especially if there's a name on the back of it... Guillaume pointed to his chair on "John Grin's Christmas" and said, at the top of his Juilliard-trained lungs "I NEVER WANT TO SEE ONE OF THOSE EVER AGAIN."
And never again he did... something like that. Well, never sat in one again, anywho.
Whew! That Was Close.....
But that's the secular world. Meanwhile, back at the lab, the world of Christian cinema is still riding high, but they'd prefer to be riding a little higher. One toke, you poor fool! Alas, Tyler Perry doesn't have quite the populist touch he had ten years ago, but he did deign to take time off from writing and producing his fifty or so sitcoms for TBS to do a little pet project of his. It was at the bottom of the pile of screenplays in his drawer. Sometimes the good stuff's at the bottom of the pile. Well, you know what? He picked up that screenplay, started to read and... three days later he emerged for a cup of coffee, leaving an ass print in his chair cushion that still hasn't budged! And that was six months ago when principal photography first started! Sure, he sent the script to Michael Chabon and the Frank Pierson Estate for rewrites, changed the title six times, but still! What a find at the bottom of the screenplay pile. And so, Acrimony... scratch that, Tyler Perry's Acrimony comes in second place, non-derogatory canine bitch! And just as the new season of "Empire" is about to kick off. Couldn't have timed it better. Probably could've advertised it better so it would make more money, but hindsight is 20/20, and turnabout is fair play. See, this is why I never got anywhere in life; I didn't use the phrase "turnabout is fair play" during my ill-spent childhood... just looking at Forest Whitaker's IMDb Top 4. Boy, but I must be really out of touch. Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai isn't in his top 4, but Battlefield Earth is? Wow.
So audiences and critics were disappointed with Tyler's latest. Why, even Rogerebert.com is reviewing his stuff again! Lord help them if they ever stop attending at all. I mean, if Kim Kardashian wasn't the last straw, what would be? Also, Tyler decided to venture past 'PG-13' territory into the much hated and or coveted 'R'. Maybe that also turned audiences off a bit. They prefer Madea at 'PG-13' levels, thank you very much. Over at Rogerebert.com, they also had a review of the much-advertised latest installment of something called God's Not Dead. My inside-the-beltway sources tell me that this is the third installment of the franchise. If this keeps up, this "God" character just might turn into the next Freddy Krueger or Jason Voorhees! Talk about God-like! They keep getting resurrected, don't they? And not just because people put their DVDs in to watch, either.
...and that's it for the debuts this week! Because that's how a blockbuster does it: it keeps new entrants from entering the marketplace that week... but given the low numbers, maybe it's just a slow week. Or maybe no one wants to go to a studio head and say that they opened against Spielberg and posted big numbers in order to get their next project green-lit. "You FOOL! Why did you DO that?"
Short Reviews - April 2018
"Mad" George Washington: Cherry Tree Chopper/Star Wars Earn Stripes - With Kevin Shinick as Benjamin Franklin / Captain Hook / Kid with Shellmet (voice).
Star Wars: Paths to Rebellion - With Durac as Frank Ugochukwu.
Star Wars: Slight Ticket Malfunction - With Amy Baklini as Frankie.
"Welcome to the Basement" "Star Wars, Buster Keaton, Dinosaur" - With William Hurt as Inspector Frank Bumstead (archive footage).
...okay, on to the rest of the 'Frank'-related titles
"La cour des grands" - With Frédéric Amico as Frank AA. Also with Françoise Michaud as Avocat Valette (2 episodes). Also with Franck Libert as Echographiste and Simon. Also with Franckie Charras as Patron Bar and Patron Bar 1. Also with Francesca Faiella as Ariana Reno. Also with Franck Monsigny as Caissier supérette. Also with François Bureloup as Patrick Roussin. Also with Benjamin Baroche as Francois Delorme. Also with Bernard Llopis as Francis. Assistant Decorator (6 Episodes, 2008): Jean-François Buson. First Assistant Decorator (6 Episodes, 2010): Rouches Frank. Second Assistant Decorator / Second Assistant Art Director (6 Episodes, 2010): Franck Pompier. Electrician (18 Episodes, 2008-2010): François Amadei. Camera Operator (6 Episodes, 2010): Franck Séchan. Location Manager (12 Episodes, 2009-2010): François La Rocca. Press Attache: France 2 (6 Episodes, 2009): Nathalie Rouanet.
"Condor" - With Gabriel Hogan as Boyd Francis (4 Episodes). Also with Billy Otis as Frank AA Speaker. Co-executive Producer (10 Episodes, 2018): Frank Siracusa. Dit (1 Episode): Francesco Marotta. Grip (1 Episode): Marco Mastrofrancesco.
Body Armour - With Louis Decosta Johnson as Franklin Aames. Also with Frank Feys as Special Agent #2. Stunts: Santi Franco.
"20 to 1" Hoaxes, Cheats and Liars - With Frank Abagnale Jr. as Himself (archive footage). Also with Leonardo DiCaprio as Frank Abagnale Jr. (archive footage). Also with Frank Farian as Himself (archive footage). Also with Franklin Dennis Jones as Earl Bradford (archive footage).
Catch Me If You Can - With Leonardo DiCaprio as Frank Abagnale Jr.. Also with Christopher Walken as Frank Abagnale (Sr.). Also with Frank John Hughes as Tom Fox. Also with Frank Abagnale Jr. as French Policeman (as Frank W. Abagnale). Also with Jean-François Blanchard as French Police Captain. Also with Jean-François Brousseau as Choir. Also with Francis Campeau as Choir. Writing Credits (book) (as Frank W. Abagnale) And (with Stan Redding): Frank Abagnale Jr.. Art Department Coordinator: Francine Byrne. Stunts: Frank Ferrara. Stunt Double: Frank Abagnale Jr. (uncredited): Trevor Fraker. Grip: Jamie Franta. Electrician (uncredited): François Legris. Costumer: Anthony Franco. Transportation Department: Frank Abagnale Jr.. Consultant (as Frank W. Abagnale): Frank Abagnale Jr.. Production Assistant (uncredited): Frank Slaten.
"Sendung ohne Namen" Wie wenig überraschend Fernsehen sein kann. - Mit Leonardo DiCaprio als Frank Abagnale Jr. (archivmaterial).
"A Man Called Shenandoah" "The Locket" - With Chris Alcaide as Frank Abbott
"Boney" "Boney Buys a Coffin"- With Rod Mullinar as Frank Abbott
"T.J. Hooker" "The Trial" - With Lee de Broux as Frank Abbott. Also with Frank Farmer as Capt. Daniels.
Grange Hill - With Mark Lewis as Frankie Abbott (16 Episodes)
"Break Point" - With Jeremy Burnham as Frank Abbott (6 episodes)
"Mannix" "To The Swiftest, Death" - With Hugh Beaumont as Frank Abbott
Friends Don't Let Friends Date Friends - With Frank Tedesco as Frank Abbott (as Frank A. Tedesco). Also with Frank Nicosia as Coffee Shop patron, and Fran Pecorella as Grandma Jo.
"A Different World" - With Frank Jenkins as Dr. Abbott (2 episodes).
Rustlers - With Addison Richards as Frank Abbott. Also with Frank Fenton as Brad Carew. Also with Francis McDonald as Pierre, Roulette Wheel (uncredited). Film Editing by: Frank Doyle. Gaffer (uncredited): Frank Uecker. Grip (uncredited): Frank Williams.
"All Star Comedy Carnival" - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott. Production Design by: Frank Gillman... and about eight other people.
Bad Friday - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott.
"The Fenn Street Gang" - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott (35 Episodes).
"Frost on Sunday" Frost at the London Palladium for the British Film and Television Awards - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott. Pianist: Petula Clark: Frank Owens.
"Grange Hill" Episode #24.1 - With Mark Lewis as Frankie Abbott (16 episodes).
Please Sir! - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott. Camera Operator: Frank Drake.
"Please Sir!" - With David Barry as Frankie Abbott (35 Episodes). Also with Frank Littlewood as Man.
"Schwester Agnes" - Mit Gunter Sonneson als Frank Abendroth. Auch mit Frank Obermann als Peter Schlesinger.
Netherbeast Incorporated - With Bruce
'Marvel Super Hero Squad Online' - With Steve Blum as ABOMINATION / Fin Fang Foom / Wolverine / Sabretooth / Super Skrull / Ghost Rider / Thanos / Frankenstein's Monster / Iron Patriot / Mr. Fix-It / Taskmaster (voice). Design Director: Franz Felsl. Systems Engineer: Kevin Francis.
Smokin' Stogies - With Bernard Furmanski as Frank Abrachi. Also with Frank Vincent as Johnny Big. Boom Operator: Frank Auer.
Storm at a Distance - With Percy Metcalf as Franklin Abrams. Also with Shawn Taiwone Francis as Isaac Abrams.
Little Deaths - With Errol Clarke as Frank's Accomplice (segment "Mutant Tool"). Also with Daniel Brocklebank as Frank (segment "Mutant Tool"). Executive Producer, Post-production Supervisor and Caterer: Ivan Francis Clements.
Sensation - With Matt Ritchey as Frank Accord.
"Berlin Bohème" "Episode #3.1" - With Holger Mehlan as Frank, Achims Lover. Also with Frank Kallinowski as Konrad, Barkeeper.
Newman's Law - With Michael Lerner as Frank Acker. Also with Louis Zorich as Frank Lo Falcone. Costume Supervisor (uncredited): Frank Cardinale.
Mint on Card - With Tony Borea as Franky Acquaviva.
Toys of Destiny - With Frank Newburg as The Actor (as Frank Newberg).
"Tales of Irish Castles" A Century of Turmoil - With Frank Ó'Deorain as Re-enactment Actor (as Frank Ó Deorain).
Shakey Grounds - With Sara Castro as Frankie's Actress #2. Also with Mike Dusi as Frankie.
Law & Order: Criminal Intent - With Michael Rispoli as Frank Adair (2 Episodes)
Crossroads - With Jon Kelley as Frank Adam (unknown episodes)
'Lego Batman 3: Beyond Gotham' - With Fred Tatasciore as Black Adam / Solomon Grundy / Killer Croc / Black Manta / Frankenstein (voice).
"Pillow Talk" - With Dan Salem as Host, Adam, Bruce, Franklin (21 Episodes).
"The Crooked Hearts" - With Michael Murphy as Frank Adamic.
"Magic City" Feeding Frenzy "Feeding Frenzy" - With Gui Inacio as Frank Adamo. Leadman (as Frank Raffa Jr.): Frank A. Raffa Jr..
Captain Midnight - With John Pickard as Frank Adams (2 episodes). Series Set Direction by: Frank Tuttle. (15 Episodes, 1954-1955) Special Effects (uncredited) (26 Episodes, 1954-1955): Franz Dallons.
The Lone Ranger - With Bruce Cowling as Frank Adams. Series Film Editing (58 Episodes, 1949-1957): Frank Capacchione. Assistant Director (3 Episodes, 1949): Francis X. Baur Jr.. Recorder (3 Episodes, 1955): Francis J. Scheid.
"Mike Hammer" "I Ain't Talkin'" - With Frank DeKova as Al Adams (as Frank de Kova). (written By): Frank Kane. Art Direction by: Frank Arrigo.
Freedom - With Frank Green as Daniel Adams. Also with Frank Taylor Green as Daniel Adams (as Frank Green). Hmmmm.... database error much?
"Street Angels" - With George Saunders as Frank Adams.
Blackboard Jungle - With Jimmy Murphy as Frank Adams (uncredited). Also with Anne Francis as Anne Dadier. Painter (uncredited): Frank Wesselhoff.
Texas Gun Fighter - With Edgar Lewis as Frank Adams (uncredited). Also with Frank Clark as Townsman (uncredited). Also with Frank Ellis as Townsman (uncredited). Co-written by (story) (uncredited): Frank Howard Clark.
The Border Patrolman - With Al Hill as Frank Adams. Also with Frank Campeau as Capt. Stevens. Cinematography by Frank B. Good... pretty good, not too great.
"City of Angels" To Halve or Halve Not "To Halve or Halve Not" - With Billy Mayo as Frank Adams. Also with Charles Emmett as L. Francis. Also with Ramón Franco as (as Ramon Franco).
"Death Valley Days" "The Young Gun" - With Reid Hammond as Frank Adams. Also with Arthur Franz as Matt Warner.
"The Division" "Virgin Territory" - With Darryl Sivad as Frank Adams
Dude Cowboy - With Byron Foulger as Frank Adams. Also with Frank Ellis as Slim (uncredited). Also with Frank O'Connor as Simpson (uncredited).
Faded Dreams - With Larry Varanelli as Frank Adams. Assistant Director: Franco Guadalupe.
High Five - With Michael Blair as Frank Adams. Also with Hannah Reynolds as Jenny Franklin. Also with Matthew J. Bauman as Franklin. Also with Joe Franks as Baseball Cap Party Dude.
"Homicide" "I Confess" - With Brian Moll as Frank Adams. Also with Frances Dunn as Val Hewett
Jigsaw - With Harrison Butler as Frank Adams
Just Be There - With Charlie McCarty as Frank Adams
"Official Detective (Stories)" "Panhandle Manhunt" - With Ron Hagerthy as Frank Adams. Also with Frank Ferguson as Hartman.
Poolside - With Jim Chlopecki as Frank Adams
"The Virginian" "Bitter Harvest" - With John Lupton as Frank Adams. Executive Producer..ed by Frank Price.
"Young Ramsay" "Young Buck" - With Bill Hunter as Frank Adams
"Stories of the Century" - With Mary Castle as Frankie Adams (26 Episodes). Also with Series Art Direction by Frank Arrigo (26 episodes).
The Catcher Was a Spy - With Martin Janous as Franklin Adams
"Fantasy Island" "Chorus Girl/Surrogate Father" - With Stuart Whitman as Franklin Adams
"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles" "Young Indiana Jones and the Scandal of 1920" - With Dylan Price as Franklin Adams. Also with Doug Richards as Frank / Stagehand... the secret heart of that episode, incidentally. E>
"Theatre Night" "The Member of the Wedding" - With Geraldine McEwan as Frankie Addams
"The DuPont Show of the Month" "The Member of the Wedding" - With Collin Wilcox Paxton as Frankie Addams (as Colin Wilcox... no relation to Bill, or so it would seem)
"ITV Play of the Week" "The Member of the Wedding" - With Frances Cuka as Frankie Addams
The Member of the Wedding - With Julie Harris as Frankie Addams. Also with Arthur Franz as Jarvis Addams. Set Decoration by Frank Tuttle.
"The Member of the Wedding" - With Dana Hill as Frankie Addams
"The Member of the Wedding" - With Anna Paquin as Frankie Addams. With First Assistant Camera: Frank Godwin.
Incidentally, my inside-the-beltway sources tell me that two remakes are in the works. First, Adam Sandler and official Sandler script maven Tim Herlihy are planning a live Netflix remake of the play. They've changed the title to "The Wedding Member," which obviously had to be done. The other is a version of the play called "The Addams Family Wedding," which Barry Sonnenfeld will probably make over at (Amazon) Prime. Okay, moving on.
Peggy - With James Best as Frank Addison. Music by Frank Skinner (uncredited).
"Archangel" - With Harry Ditson as Frank Adelman
Gifted - With Chris Evans as Frank Adler. Also with Frank R. Wilson as Judge (uncredited). Key Set Costumer: Erica Frank. Music Assistant: Francesco Le Metre.
"The Incredible Hulk" "Wildfire" - With Dean Brooks as Frank Adler. Directed by Frank Orsatti
"Man Servants" - With Charlie Waring as Franklin Adronikov... what is the sound of no episodes clapping?
"The Team" - Med Koen De Bouw som Frank Aers (8 Episodes)
People Business - With Ryan DeCook as Frank, Age 11. Also with David Malboeuf as Frank.
The Last Sign - With Tyler Hynes as Frank. Also with Edgar Geylik as Frank, age 5. Casting By: Jean-François Campeau. Production Design by: Jean-François Campeau. Production Manager: France (as Béatrice Chauvin-Ballay): Béatrice Chauvin. Second Unit Director or Assistant Director: François Bouchard. Swing Gang: François Bouchard. Scenic Painter: France Goulet. Production Assistant: Hybride: Jean-Francois Houde. Digital Compositor: Hybride: Francois Leduc. Electrician: Francis Pépin-Viau. Additional Clapper Loader: Jean-Francois Tousignant. Assistant Location Manager: Josée Francis. Administrator: France: Jacques Dubecq. Accountant: Dominique LaFrance. Set Production Assistant: Jean-François Rioux. Production Secretary: France: Anne-Marie Souny. Accountant: France: Tiphanie Triki. Accountant: France: Laura Valade.
Twisted Fiction - With Billy Chambers as Frank Age 6. Also with Rhys Ethan as Frank Lapin.
Fatal Games - With Michael O'Leary as Frank Agee.
"Aftershock: Earthquake in New York" - With Mitchell Ryan as Frank Agostini (2 episodes). Head Greensman (uncredited) (unknown Episodes): Frank Haddad. Model Shop Crew (2 Episodes, 1999): Ayse Francis. Driver: Cast (2 Episodes, 1999): Peter Franta.
Scacco alla mafia (aka Defeat of the Mafia) - With Luciano Pigozzi as Frankie Agostino (as Alan Collins). Also with Franco Borelli as Leone. Sound Recordist: Franco Borni.
Jour après jour (...day after day?) - With Stéphane Rouabah as Frank's ag{g}ressor (flashback). Also with Jo Prestia as Frank. Also with Linda Dorfers as Frank's wife. Also with Eric Sebakhi as Frank's ag[g]ressor (flashback)
"Kay O'Brien" Kayo on Call "Kayo on Call" - With Mark Margolis as Frank Agretti. Also with Franc Luz as Sam.
"Falcon Crest" - With Rod Taylor as Frank Agretti (31 Episodes)... also with Robert Donner as Tucker Fixx (5 episodes)... just sayin'. I mean, hey! Why don't they do what he says, say what he means..............
Os Sonhos de um Sonhador: A História de Frank Aguiar - With Frank Aguiar as Himself. Also with Leandro Lehart as Banda de Frank. Also with Gustavo Leão as Frank Aguiar. Also with Jorge Neto as Frank Pequeno. Also with Luygo Vaz as Frank Jovem.
"The Richard Boone Show" Welcome Home, Dan - With Lloyd Bochner as Frank Ahearn.
"A Masterpiece of Murder" - With Don Ameche as Frank Aherne. Also with Anne Francis as Ruth Beekman. Also with Frank Gorshin as Pierre Rudin. Also with Francois Najda.
UFO - With David Strathairn as Franklin Ahls... I've heard of him! Went to High School with Ahls. Wotta jerk
"The Border" "Pockets of Vulnerability" - With Norris Mathews as Frankie Ahmad (as Norris Yacoub). Stunts: Tariq/Frankie: Mathieu Ledoux.
"Der absurde Mord" - Mit Peter Sattmann als Frank Ahrend.
"Army Wives" "All or Nothing" - With Victor Turner as Frank's Aide. Also with Terry Serpico as Frank Sherwood. Music Supervisor: Frankie Pine.
Don't You Recognise (British spelling) Me? - With Mark Donaghy as Frank Aiello.
Parent News 2: What Is the Internet? - With Mark Hulderman as Frank Ainsa.
"Criminal Minds" "Brothers Hotchner" - With Matt Gulbranson as Franklin Airport Baggage Handler (uncredited).
One in a Million - With Fred Santley as Frankie, A.K.A. 'Madame Francois' (as Frederic Santley). Also with Francis Sayles as Mr. Dickman tee hee hee. Directed by: Frank R. Strayer.
"For Brothers" - With Lavinia Osei as Francesca A.K.A. Frankie.
Fukri - With Bhagath Baby Manuel as Franklin A.K.A. Franky.
Sprich mit mir - Mit Richard van Weyden als Frank A.K.A. Sehnsucht.
How to Stop a Man from Committing Suicide - With Christopher Papastefanou as Frank A.K.A. Voice of God.
Grace Is Gone - With Rob Wichman as Frankie A.K.A.: The Hobo. Co-producer: Franklin Kielar. Cinematography by Franklin Kielar. Graphic Designer: Franklin Kielar... cinematography AND graphic design? Is that a good combination? Guess we'll never know.
Shadows of the West - With Seymour Zeliff as Frank Akuri.
Cherchez l'idole - Avec Frank Alamo comme Frank Alamo. Aussi avec Franck Fernandel comme Richard, Franco Califano comme Le metteur en scène, François Cadet comme Un plombier (non crédité). Aussi avec Édouard Francomme comme Un spectateur au récital de Charles Aznavour (non crédité), et Françoise Sagan comme Une invitée au spectacle de Sylvie Vartan (non crédité). Remerciements spéciaux: Gérard Depardieu... probablement.
"Lip Service" - With Ruta Gedmintas as Frankie Alan (9 Episodes)
"T. J. Hooker" "Gang War" - With Rudy Negrete as Frankie Alarcon
"Medical Center" "The Deceived" - With Greg Mullavey as Frank Alber. Series co-created by Frank Glicksman.
"Harlock Saga" - With Gregory Abbey as Alberich (6 Episodes, English version, voice - as Frank Frankson)
"Law & Order" "Securitate" - With Mike Alpert as Frank Albers
"Wilsberg" "Die Bielefeld-Verschwörung" - Mit Robert Gallinowski als Frank Albers. Auch mit Frank Voß als Dr. Ludwig Köhn. Szenenbild von Frank Prümmer.
"Father Brown" "The Owl of Minerva" - With Harry McEntire as Frank Albert. Production Design by: Francis Boyle. Historical Adviser (as Dr Matthew Francis): Matthew Francis.
Folklore's Intimates - With Harry Johnson as Frank Albert. Special Thanks: Frances Andrews.
The Spirit of Stanford - With Frankie Albert as Frankie Albert. Also with Frank Ferguson as Psychology Professor (uncredited). Cinematography by Franz Planer.
"Doctors" "Never Event" - With Geoff(rey) Leesley as Frank Albertini
The Cohens and Kellys in Hollywood - With Frank Albertson as Frank Albertson (uncredited). Directed by John Francis Dillon.
Main Street to Broadway - With Frank Albertson as Frank Albertson (uncredited). Also with Herb Shriner as Frank Johnson, and Frank Ferguson as Mr. Cope in Fantasy Sequence.
"Murder, She Wrote" "Good-Bye Charlie" - With Bill Maher as Frank Albertson, and... seriously? Bill Maher? Weerd! What-ev'z.........
Happy Days - With Frank Albertson as Frankie Albertson. Also with Frank Richardson as Minstrel Show Performer. Also with Frank McKee as Chorus Man. Also with Fran Heller as Chorus Man.
Mädchen hinter Gittern - Mit Harry Riebauer als Frank Albin
Arne Dahl: Dödsmässa, Arne Dahl: Efterskalv, Arne Dahl: En midsommarnattsdröm, Arne Dahl: Himmelsöga og Arne Dahl: Mörkertal - Alle med Kenneth Milldoff som Frank Albrekt (10 Episoder)
Panhandlers - With Jay Pennick as Frank Albright
Mal Alibi - With Eric Schuster as Frank Alda
"The Republic" - With Marc Singer as Frank Alden
"Murder" "The Third Voice" - With Conor McCarron as Frankie Alder. Also with Frank Gilhooley as Rafe Carey.
"Blindsided by Love" - With Kelsey Bohlen as Frankie Alder
Children of the Night - What music *they* make! Bla-ha-ha... I mean, with Evan MacKenzie as Frank Aldin
"100,000 Dollar Belohnung" - Med Helmuth Schneider som Franklin Aldin
"Big Deal" - With Ben Howard as Frank Aldino (3 episodes), and... for all those database error fans out there, you're not going to believe this... I mean, you're just not, but I think I found one here. See, we've got Eric Francis as Stan (2 episodes)... but then we got Eric FrancEs ALSO as Stan! Guess it's just that old British sense of humour or something. Well, you can't always find a John Hyland or a Brad Garrett in Eight Men Out, I suppose... dang! They fixed that one!
"My Time" - With Tom Lind as Frank Aldrich
"The Front" - With Josh Durham as Frank Aldridge (6 episodes)
"Neighbours" - With Bob Ruggiero as Frank Alessi (3 episodes, 1 as Francis Billings!!! Sorry... SPOILER ALERT)
"Marcus Welby, M. D." "Public Secrets" - With William Dozier as Frank Alexander. Assistant Director: Frank Shaw Jr.
"Hill Street Blues" "Gatorbait" - With Lawrence Benedict as Frank Alexander
"Final 24" "Tupac Shakur" - With Bishop Brent as Frank Alexander. Also with Frank Alexander as Himself... Bodyguard. Also with Markus Francis as Travon Lane.
"Good Morning, Miami" - With Jere Burns as Frank Alfano (35 Episodes)
Aswang - With Paul D. Villamor as Frankie Allan. Also with Francisco Sacabin as Policeman 3. Props Maker: Francis Sanchez. 3D Artist: Imaginary Friends Studio / Senior Compositor: Imaginary Friends Studio: Francis Allan V. Andalis. Gaffer (as Kiko Mangubat Jr.): Francisco Mangubat.
"24" - With Edoardo Ballerini as Frank Allard (3 Episodes)
Enhörningen - Mit Olof Bergström als Frank Allard. Auch mit Ivar Wahlgren als Lautsprecher auf Frankspartei (im Abspann)
"Eurogang" "Blüten Für Frankfurt" - Mit Wolfgang Preiss als Frank Allen
Young Tom Edison - With Frances Morris as Woman at Station (uncredited). Also with Marvin Stephens as Frank Allen (uncredited). Also with Frank Whitbeck as Narrator (voice) (uncredited).
The Big Brother - With Frank Bennett as Frank Allen. Also with Francelia Billington as Lillian Watkins.
Chaos Theory - With Ryan Reynolds as Frank Allen. Also with David Berner as Frank's Doctor. Also with Simon Chin as Target of Frank's Attack. Head Greensman: Frank Haddad. Colorist (uncredited): Frank Robinson.
A Conflicting Conscience - With Wadsworth Harris as Frank Allen.
A Costume Piece - With Harry T. Morey as Frank Allen. Also with J. Herbert Frank.
Deadline - U.S.A. - With Ed Begley as Frank Allen. Also with Betty Francine as Telephone Operator (uncredited). Also with Joe Sawyer as Whitey Franks (uncredited). Also with Frank Wilcox as Senator (uncredited).
Passenger 57 - With Dennis Letts as Frank Allen. Also with Frank Causey as Captain Whitehurst. Also with Frank Hart as Flight Engineer. Re-recording Mixer (as Frank Jones): Franklin Jones Jr.. Camera Operator: Frank Miller.
Pretty Rosebud - With Wolfgang Bodison as Frank Allen.
The Slacker's Heart - With Edward Arnold as Frank Allen.
"Unsolved Mysteries" "Episode #3.17" - With Bill Vashon as Frank Allen.
Through Eyes of Men - With Frank Mayo as Franklyn Allen.
Wicked as They Come - With Sidney James as Frank Allenborg. Also with Frank Atkinson as Hotel Porter (uncredited).
Center of the Web - With Bo Hopkins as Frank Allesendro.
"Inspector George Gently" "Gently in the Night" - With Diarmaid Murtagh as Frank Allingham (as Diarmuid Murtagh).
"Branded" "Nice Day for a Hanging" - With James Anderson as Frank Allison. Writer: Frank Chase.
"6 Guns" - With Barry Van Dyke as Frank Allison. Also with Dick Van Dyke as Chief Not Terribly Proud
The Jilt - With Owen Moore as Frank Allison. Also with Florence Lawrence as Mary... Frank's Sister
Maxime - With Richard Larke as Frank Allison
"Spenser: For Hire" "Widow's Walk" - With John Fiore as Frankie Almeida (uncredited). Also with Ron McLarty as Sgt. Frank Belson (credit only)... what, is NO ONE proud to be on this show??!!!
"Empty Vessels Interactive" - With Francis Hills as Frankie Almost. Co-directed, co-written, co-produced, music, co-cinematographed, edited and catered by Francis Hills as well
"666 Park Avenue" "Murmurations" - With Mike Doyle as Frank Alpern
The Assistant - With Gil Bellows as Frank Alpine
"Der Gehilfe" - Mit Marius Müller-Westernhagen als Frank Alpine. MEINE GOTTEN HIMMEL!!!!
"Tales From the Dark" "Mirror Mirror" - With John Basedow as Frank Alter Ego, and with Bob Socci as Frank Alter Ego II: Alter Ego Boogaloo. Oh, and with Nick Gauthier as Frank... Sacre Bleué! They've thought of EVERYTHING! This Frank must be quite the conflicted character, n'est ce pas? Also with Frank Rosner as Antique Dealer.
"Wolff's Turf(f)" "Gebrochene Herzen" - Mit Siegfried Grönig als Frank Altmann
"Küstenwache" "Im Todesgriff" - Mit Bernhard Piesk als Frank Altmann
The Miami Story - With Dan Riss as Frank Alton. Composer - Stock Music: W. Franke Harling (uncredited)
Piernas de Seda - Con Raul Roulien como Frank Alton. También con Francisco Moreno como Conroy (apodo Paco Moreno)
Joe Palooka, Champ - With Pat McKee as Franki Altri's Handler (uncredited). Also with Frank O'Connor as Policeman (uncredited). Assistant Director: Frank Fox.
"Ben Casey" "Little Drops of Water, Little Grains of Sand" - With Aldo Ray as Frank Alusik
"NCIS: New Orleans" "Darkest Hour" - With Shani Atias as Frankie Alvarez, and with Gary Oldman as Sir Winston Churchill
His Sister - With Guy Oliver as Frank Alvin
A Medal for Benny - With Nestor Paiva as Frank Alviso (uncredited). Also with Frank McHugh as Edgar Lovekin, and Frank Reicher as Father Bly (uncredited). Story / screenplay by Frank Butler and Jack Wagner... sorry, but you know I always like it when Franks and Jacks get together to do stuff, like screenplays.
"Softly Softly" "Find the Lady" - With Victor Maddern as Frank Amber
"Lie to Me" "The Better Half" - With David Harbour as Frank Ambrose
The Notorious Landlady - With Fred Astaire as Franklyn Armbruster. Stunts by Frankie Darro (uncredited).
"Hawaiian Eye" "The Koa Man" - With John
"Chicago P. D." "Forty-Caliber Bread Crumb" - With Keith Kupferer as Frank Amerson
"Medic" "Candle of Hope" - With Francis De Sales as Frank Ames. Produced by Frank La Tourette.
"24" "9:00 a.m. - 10:00 a.m." - With Ivar
Suzanna's New Suit - With Fred Gamble as Frank Ames
"Treasury Men in Action" "The Case of the Deadly Dilemma" - With Charles Bronson as Frankie Ames... this is my new favourite episode title, incidentally. Oh, it's not just a deadly dilemma, folks... it's a whole case of them! And speaking of Charles Bronson...
The City Gone Wild - With Wyndham Standing as Franklin Ames
Momtress - With Steven Cambria as Frank Amirata... okay, I'll bite. For some reason I was thinking "fortress." It's actually barely a portmanteau of mom and actress! I'm guessing it's an L. A. story probably.
Who Killed Johnny Love? - With Raymond Carmiciano as Frankie Amore
"Labirinto" - Con Raul Gazolla como Franklin Amorim (¿episodios desconocidos... lo difícil es que averiguar?)
Destressed - With Frank Amoruso as Frank Amoruso ... as Himself
"Junior: The Miniseries" - With Frankie Solano as Frankie... an Excellent Dancer (3 episodes). As for who plays the Ahnold Schwarzenegger role, well... I'll leave that to the real experts to decide
War Nurse - With James Bush as Frank and Wally's Buddy (uncredited)
Hit and Runway - With John Fiore as Frank Andero. Music by: Frank Piazza. Recording Engineer: Overdub: Frank Piazza. Background Vocalist: Kemba Francis. Musician: Drums: Mark Frankel. Music Arranger / Music Producer / Musician: Guitar / Musician: Keyboards / Musician: Synth Programmer / Co-caterer: Frank Piazza. Set Intern: Peter Lufrano.
"Surfside 6" "Bride and Seek" - With Grant Williams as Frank Anders
Death, or Something Like It - With Kevin B(.) Hartley as Frank Anders
"Institute for Revenge" - With Ray Walston as Frank Anders
"Forsvar" "Fremtid med havudsigt 2. del" - Med Rasmus Haxen som Frank Andersen. Også med Petrine Agger som Frank Andersens kone
"Landsbyden" ("The Village") - Med Søren Østergaard som Frank Andersen (27 Afleveringen... Game Øverr!)
"Starsky and Hutch" - With Bert Remsen as Franklin Anderson (2 episodes)
"Legends & Lies" "The Patriots: America's First Christmas" - With Dietrich Teschner as Frank Anderson. Construction Foreman: Frank Addington.
"Space Command" - With Robert Barclay as Frank Anderson. Also with William Shatner as (1953).
A Battle of Wits - With Earle Foxe as Frank Anderson
Chasing Ghosts - With Mark Rolston as Frank Anderson. Boom Operator: Frank Zaragoza. Still Photographer: Francine Yang.
"Girlfriends" "The Importance of Being Frank" - With Kent Faulcon as Frank Anderson
"The Good Wife" "After the Fall" - With Jack Gilpin as Frank Anderson. Art Direction by: Frank White III (as Frank White).
"La caja de problemas" - Con Jerry Segarra como Frank Anderson
"Law of the Plainsman" "Full Circle" - With Wayne Rogers as Frank Anderson. Film Editing by: Frank Sullivan. Sound: Frank H. Wilkinson.
"Natural Remedy" - With Sebastian MacLean as Frank Anderson
Normal Life - With Tom Towles as Frank Anderson. Storyboard Artist: Frank Coronado...ooh! Also with Ashley Judd as Pam Anderson. Oh, PUH-LEEEEEEEEEEZE.
The Poughkeepsie Tapes - With Henry Dittman as Frank Anderson. Foley Mixer (as Frank Aglieri-Rinella): Frank Rinella.
"Seven Wonders of the Industrial World" "The Hoover Dam" - With Erik J. Anderson as Frank Anderson. Also with Jay Benedict as Frank Crowe.
Shouting Mountain - With Lawrence Anthony as Frank Anderson
Trafficked - With Courtney Gains as Frank Anderson. Executive Producer: Frank Mayor.
Paradise in Harlem - With Frank H. Wilson as Lem Anderson (as Frank Wilson). Also with Francine Everett as Desdemona Jones. Story by Frank L. Wilson.
The Phantom of Crestwood - With Matty Kemp as Frank Andes
бляха Шериф - 3 Анатолій kotenyov as Френк Andgeli
"Yo Soy Franky" - Con María Gabriela de Faría como Franky Andrade (159 Episodes). Also con July Pedraza como Profesora Franky.
Lydia - With Hans Jaray as Frank Andre (as Hans Yaray). Also with Frank Conlan as Old Ned.
"Law & Order" "Invaders" - With Bruce MacVittie as Frank Andreas.
Zarra's Law - With Brian Tarantina as Frankie Andreoli. Also with Franco Quartuccio as Tommy.
"Cain's Hundred" "Degrees of Guilt" - With David Brian as Frank Andreotis. Also with Frank Richards as Bartender. Recording Supervisor: Franklin Milton.
"Deadly Women" "Greed" - With Kevin Dicconson as Franklin Andrews
"Another World" - With Peter Brandon as Frank Andrews (2 Episodes). Also with William H. Macy as
"Cinemassacre's Monster Madness" "The Wolf Man" - With Patric Knowles as Frank Andrews (archive footage).
The Wayfarers - With Gayne Whitman as Frank Andrews (as Alfred Vosburgh).
"The Alaskans" "Heart of Gold" - With Frank Ferguson as Brother Barlow. Also with Gary Vinson as Frank Andrews. Composer: Theme Music: Fran Frey.
The Battle of the Sexes - With Donald Crisp as Frank Andrews. Also with Mary Alden as Mrs. Frank Andrews.
Danny Boy - With Walter Soderling as Frank Andrews.
"Division 4" "The Infiltrator" - With Mark Albiston as Frank Andrews. Also with Gerard Kennedy as Sen. Det. Frank Banner. Also with Frank Taylor as Sgt. Scotty MacLeod.
"The Gene Autry Show" "The Silver Arrow" - With Robert Livingston as Frank Andrews. Also with Frankie Marvin as Townsman (uncredited). Also with Frank Matts as Townsman (uncredited). Directed by: Frank McDonald. Stunts (uncredited): Frank Matts.
"Juliet Bravo" "Cause for Complaint" - With Allan McClelland as Frank Andrews
"The New Breed" "Edge of Violence" - With Ben Wright as Frank Andrews.
"Portrait of a Stripper" - With Edward Herrmann as Frank Andrews. Also with Frank Birney as Director. Executive Producer: Frank von Zerneck.
"Roseanne" "The Truth Be Told" - With Johnny Dark as Frank Andrews. Cinematography by: Frank Doll.
"The Teeth of the Wind" - With Alan Hopgood as Frank Andrews
Too Many Cooks - With Hallam Cooley as Frank Andrews. Written (by): Frank Craven.
The Wolf Man - With Patric Knowles as Frank Andrews. Also with Caroline Frances Cooke as Townswoman (uncredited). Music co-composed and co-orchestrated (uncredited) by: Frank Skinner.
"Your Worst Nightmare" "Bump in the Night" - With Jason Vail as Frank Andrews
"As the World Turns" "Episode dated 24 December 1984" - With Jacques Perreault as Frank Andropoulos. Also with Terri Vandenbosch as Frannie Hughes. Lighting Director: Frank Olson.
Farmer for a Day - With Douglas Leavitt as Frank, Andy's Brother-In-Law (uncredited).
Host to a Ghost - With Frank Mills as Frank, Andy's helper.
Franky's Heaven - With Steven Michael Kovalic as Franky's Angel (as Steven Kovalic). Also with Don Austin as Franky.
"Three's Company" - With Jordan Charney as Frank Angelino (11 episodes, one as Mr. Layton)
"First Night" "The Strain" - With Ray Barrett as Frank Angelo
Subway Cafe - With Tony Pasqualini as Frank Angelo.
"Canterbury's Law" - With James McCaffrey as Frank Angstrom (4 Episodes)
"87th Precinct" "Lady Killer" - With Billy E. Hughes as Frankie Annuci (as Billy Hughes)
Illegal Aliens - With Jules Medcraft as Tiffany Ann-Franklin. Also with Elisabette Hine-Francis as Student.
City Hall - With Danny Aiello as Frank Anselmo. Also with Anthony Franciosa as Paul Zapatti (as Tony Franciosa). Also with Fran Brill as Angie. Set Decoration by: Robert J. Franco. Supervising Sound Editor (as Rick Franklin): Richard C. Franklin. Set Production Assistant: Adam Ben Frank.
"Samvidhaan: The Making of the Constitution of India" - With Kaizaad Kotwal as Frank Anthony (2 episodes)
"Ellery Queen" "The Adventure of the Sunday Punch" - With Robert Alda as Frank Anthony. Also with Ken Swofford as Frank Flannigan.
The Year Past - With Josh Henderson as Frank Antillies
"Hawaii Five-O" "Blood Money Is Hard to Wash" - With Clayton Naluai as Frankie Apollo
"Crisis" "How Far Would You Go" - With Jason Bradley as FBI Agent Frank Appel. Also with Dermot Mulroney as Francis Gibson.
How I Killed Pistol Rogers - With Jessica Saul as Frankie Applebee. Producer: Spencer Frankeberger.
"The Young and the Restless" - With William Akey as Frank Applegate (3 episodes)
"Hawaiian Eye" "Father, Dear Father" - With Lawrence Dobkin as Frank Appleton. Co-music by Frank Perkins (uncredited).
"Perry Mason" "The Case of a Place Called Midnight" - With Robert Emhardt as Frank Appleton
Fighting Trouble - With Thomas Browne Henry as Frankie Arbo (as Thomas B. Henry)
"The True Story of Spit MacPhee" - With Ray Meagher as Frank "Non-Fatty" Arbuckle (4 Episodes)
"The Dead Beat" - With Matthew Edison as Frank Arbus
"The Power Game" "The New Minister" - With Peter Cellier as Frank Archer
"NYPD Blue" "True Confessions" - With Gary Bullock as Frank Archer. Also with Dennis Franz as Det. Andy Sipowicz.
"Grantchester" "Episode #2.2" - With Nicky Henson as Frank Archer
Crossed - With Christopher J. Otis as Frank Archer. Also with Jerry Murdock as Frank Archer Sr.
Crying with Laughter - With Malcolm Shields as Frank Archer
"Fullmetal Alchemist" - With Troy Baker as Frank Archer (15 episodes, English version, voice) / Additional Voices (4 episodes, English version, voice). Also with Shô Hayami as Frank Archer (15 episodes, Japanese version, voice... as Susumu Hayami). Also with Frank Ford as Additional Voices (English version, voice).
"Swamp Murders" "Mystery at Palm Beach" - With Ryan Davenport as Frank Archer
Fait Accompli - Avec Michael Madsen comme Frank Barlow. Baiseur de mère chef responsable (comme Frank J. Zito III): Frank Zito.
"Person of Interest" "Reassortment" - With James Ciccone as Frank Capello
The Devil Incarnate - With Tom Riska as Frank Davidson
"Homicide" "A Game of Chance" - With Alan Rowe as Frank Edwards. Also with Frank Rich as Bianchi.
Freitag, der 13. - Mit Rolf Weih als Frank Fux... Ich schwöre bei Gott
The Chapman Report - With Harold J. Stone as Frank Garnell. Composer: Stock Music (uncredited): Frank Perkins
"The Middle" - With Patricia Heaton as Frankie Heck (214 episodes)
"Honeyboy" - With Robert Alan Browne as Frank Ingalls. Also with Frank Romano as Official.
Great Balls of Fire! - With Crystal Robbins as Frankie Jean. Driver: Frank Firneno.
The Secret Call - With Harry Beresford as Frank Kelly. Also with Frances Moffett as Gwen Allen.
"Verbotene Liebe" - With Christian Wunderlich as Frank Levinsky (464 Episodes)
"Death in Paradise" "Until Death Do You Part" - With William Ash as Frank Mellor
"The Untouchables" - With Paul Regina as Frank Nitti (42 Episodes)
Wittekerke - Mit Marc Coessens als Frank Opdebeeck (824 Episoden)
A Little Child Shall Lead Them - With Henry Otto as Frank Peyton
"Granite Flats" - With Scott Christopher as Frank Quincy (21 Episodes)
30 Rock - With Judah Friedlander as Frank Rossitano (138 episodes... okay, okay, with one as Streaker 1. Happy now?)
"Boy Meets World" - With Ethan Suplee as Frankie Stechino (19 Episodes)
Alarm für Cobra 11 - Einsatz für Team 2 - Mit Hendrik Duryn als Frank Traber (11 epizoden, 2003-2005). Serie Kinematographie von: Frank Theisejans (2 Episodes, 2005). Kameramann: "B" Kamera (1 Episode, 2003): Frank Theisejans.
"Stolen Moments: A Jazz Benefit for San Bernardino Cares" - With Frank Unzueta as Frank Unzueta (...himself much?)
"San Diego Film Awards" - With Francis Jacob Engle as the Visual Effects guy (as Frank Engle). Also with Francine Filsinger as Herself - Presenter. Second Unit Makeup Artist: Francia Cohen. Second Unit Sound Recordist: Frank Forth. Production Assistant: Francis Jacob Engle.
"SOKO Stuttgart" "Bis zur letzten Rille" - Med Ingo Naujoks som Frank Wolff
"Isidingo" "Episode #1.2086" - With Kevin Smith as Frank Xavier
Adventures of a Pizza Guy - With Eric Wigston as Franky Young
"Dead Last" "Heebee Geebee's" - With Franc Ross as Frank Z.
"Abschnitt 40" "Zechanschlussraub" - Mit Karl Kranzkowski als Frank Zylka. Auch mit Ole Puppe als Polizeihauptkommissar Sebastian Franke, Jeannette Arndt als Carola Franke, und bei Franziska Arnold als Barbara Zylka (gutgeschreiben als Franziska Matthus).
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