Box Office Autopsy

Awwright! Let's dissect this Box Office corpse. At #10 it's Poseidon, still on the radar for now, 8th overall at the box office with 54.9 mill total. Ya need a hit, Wolfgang!
Meanwhile at #9, RV is about to drive off into the horizon, but look out for European RV and Christmas RV coming down the pike. Get Chechik on the phone! Quick!
Mission Impossible 3 ... Well, it's not quite doing the impossible, but it is at #8 this week with a Paltrow 3.02 million. 127 mill overall, making it 4th cumulative-wise.
At #7, PHC debuts with a strong 4.57 million... strong for Altman, anyway. Did The Player hit #1? Ya need a hit, Lindsay!
Clinging on with proverbial claws and dropping down the curtain, ripping all the way, it's Over the Hedge at #6. It is 3rd overall with 130 million total; so far that only means one sequel. We'll see how that one does, then we'll talk trilogy. Still no sequel to Antz, right?
Now we're into the heavy hitters! sort of. Da Vinci's still boffo at #5; at 189 million it's 2nd overall cumulative-wise. Looks like it'll make 200 million after all. Everyone breathe a sigh of relief - Opie's still got it!
At #4 it's The Omen, folks. And I thought you wanted to be SCARED, America! Guess reality's bad enough as it is. But at least we have Enzyte these days, right? Good work, Bob!
X3 at #3! Isn't this how it should be? Guess the studio doesn't think so. How would that look in an ad? "It's the #3 movie in America!" Don't think so. But Nacho Libre's got that ad in the can just in case. Anyway, the conspiracy. Bryan Singer directed the first two X-Men movies. He is executive producing a hit show on Fox called House, M.D. Hmph! House. A guy named House. What next? A hip, precocious kid named Fudge? Then you have super-director Brett Ratner, director of X3, who is exec-prodding ... surprise! A hit show on Fox! Prison Break! Boy, they don't let just anybody direct these things! Guess that's probably why Joe Carnahan didn't stay attached to MI3, no pun intended... Shame on me! I thought he was a one-film wonder! I didn't know he did Narc! Maybe I'll watch it.

Oh yeah, and Break-Up at #2, and Cars debuts at #1, big surprise. I mean, let's face it, there's no beating the high that was X3 at #3, right folks? ;) Gotta go, it's dinnertime. So sad! It's the part of Octopussy where there's no Maud Adams! quel dommage. And to think she lost out to Mimi Rogers in Dumb and Dumber 2. Tasteless? No such thing!