Sunday, June 21, 2020

Success Amplified, Access Simplified

Brought to you by That Vertical Line on the Documents You Scan Now.  That Vertical Line on the Documents You Scan Now!  Well, small price to pay to automate things, right?  For now... for now.  Also brought to you by The Eh-Pock Tymes.  The Eh-Pocckyn Thymes!  All The News That's Fit To Trump.  Well, while we're waiting for the box office receipts for his Tulsa, Oklahoma post-Juneteenth Rally to Help Spread Covid-19, it's time to play our old game, Who's Accused of Rape Today?  This week our contestants are Chris D'Elia, Ansel Elgort and Danny Masterson, not necessarily in that order.  And of course, Donald Trump, for going against the wishes of the estate of Tom Petty for using the song "I Won't Back Down."  No you won't, sir!  That much is very, very clear.  Well, God bless the Petty family for using one of the tools of Trumpland: a Cease and Desist Order.  Probably won't help, but it's what anyone and everyone should do if you're dealing with this man.  Let's hope John Bolton's current gambit puts a dent in things... what else?  Well, this was a big week for corporate re-branding.  Uncle Ben, Cream of Wheat, Mrs. Butterworth, Eskimo brand ice cream bars... all fall down!  Brought to you by Necco Wafers.  Wassup, My Necco!
Whelp, because of Coronavirus, AKA Covid-19... is it just me, or is it getting a little bit harder to get the worldwide totals?  It's like I gotta watch CNN or something.  Bore ring.  But as a consequence of global warming, vulnerability to viruses like Covid-19 has increased.  Also, trees are more vulnerable to predators, species are migrating to try and keep within their comfort zones, what have you... on the other hand, because everything's shut down, CO2 levels are dropping.  Ummm... where's Trump's thank you for that?  Also, he's going to roll out a vaccine just in time for October.  Second thank you?  Perhaps a vote?  In the meantime, the American box office is still reduced to a few drive-ins, and the basement of my source for Russian bootleg copies of movies currently in theatres.  Always like to keep up to date on theatre-only watermarks!  Anyway, as of this writing, there's just the two movies in the Top 10, one of which is new.  And the timing couldn't be better!  It's either an homage to, or a play on, this holiday... I'll give our current president a little bit of credit.  He's of course being as douche-y as possible about it, but I'll admit I wasn't aware of Juneteenth.  I've got too many portmanteaus in my life as it is.  White privilege much?  I'm clinging to the rim of white privilege myself; I'm not one of the fortunate ones in one of the small inner circles.  Reminds me: I gotta update my "database" files.  We're up to 11 million in title numbers now!  So what is that title anyway?  I tell you darlings, if I don't make a note of it now, I'm going to not remember when I re-look at this post five years from now.  So what do I go to see when I drop the kids off at the latest Avengers movie?  I mean... was it 13 Thirteenth Avenue?  No?  Well, what about A Time to Be Remembered (A Juneteenth Story)"Adventures in Wonderland" Friday the Umpteenth perhaps?  Ooh!  I remember umpteenth!  "Air Waves" Happy Sixteenth perhaps?  "Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Eighteenth Prophecy - Epidemic possibly?  "Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Fifteenth Prophecy - Revolution of the Doubt perhaps?  "Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Fourteenth Prophecy - The Red Scarf"Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Nineteenth Prophecy - The Convoy on the Road"Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Seventeenth Prophecy - The Tattoo"Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Sixteenth Prophecy - Fateful Decisions"Al Ahd: Al Kalam Al Mubah" The Thirteenth Prophecy - From Here We Start maybe?  Whew!  Prophecy overload.  "Amici di Maria de Filippi" Thirteenth Edition: Afternoon"Are You Afraid of the Dark?" The Tale of the Thirteenth Floor"Armstrong Circle Theatre" The Thirteenth"Atlanta" Juneteenth"Batman" The Thirteenth Hat"Black-ish" Juneteenth"Blood Banquet Theatre" The Thirteenth Guest"Bonanza" The Thirteenth Man"Broadway Television Theatre" The Night of January Sixteenth"Broadway Television Theatre" The Thirteenth Chair"Brutalmoose" The Thirteenth Year - Movie Review - Luke & Ian"Buurtwag" Fotogeleentheid"Catweazle" The Thirteenth SignCHIKARA the Thirteenth Hat"Climax!" The Thirteenth Chair"Criminal Minds" The Thirteenth StepCypress Hill: Dr. Greenthumb"Danger" The Night of March Fifteenth"Delilah & Julius" Project Greenthumb"Disneycember" The Thirteenth Year"Doctor Who: Alternate Reality" The Fifteenth Doctor Part Two"Doctor Who: Alternate Reality" The Sixteenth Doctor"Doctor Who: Alternate Reality" The Thirteenth DoctorDoctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Alzura"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Attack of the Kamolians (Pilot)"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Attack of the Kamolians"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Daxter's Hundreds"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Lost in Sub-Space"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Origins of the Dark Doctor"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Revenge of Thantos"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" Terror of the Ceraphoyd"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" The Doctor's Sacrifice: Part One"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" The Doctor's Sacrifice: Part Two"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" The Frozen Earth"Doctor Who: Parallel Thirteenth Doctor" The Ghost of Time"Doctor Who: The Fan Show" Thirteenth Doctor Reaction"Doctors" The Thirteenth"Donna's Revenge" The Sixteenth Minute"El Hazard: The Alternative World" Thirteenth Night: A Night of Captivation, Temptation, and Purification"Epic Ink" Friday the Thirteenth"Fast Politics" Sixteenth Aired 6/1/16"Festival" Summer of the Seventeenth DollFifteenth Phase of the Moon"Fillmore!" The Nineteenth Hole Is a Shallow Grave"Fitness for Every Life" Thirteenth ShowFoodways in the Eighteenth CenturyFourteenth LoverFriday the ThirteenthFriday the ThirteenthFriday, the ThirteenthFriday, the Thirteenth"Ghost Squad" The Thirteenth Girl"Green Gables Fables" Week Ten - Friday the Thirteenth"Hammer House of Horror" The Thirteenth Reunion"Hawkins" Murder on the Thirteenth FloorHow to Be Eighteenth CenturyImi Von-Stogel The Sixteenth Year"Ironside" The Fourteenth Runner"Josie and the Pussycats" A Greenthumb Is Not a GoldfingerJuly SixteenthJuneteenthJuneteenth JamboreeKen Bone's Fifteenth Minute"The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince" Fifteenth Cup"The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince" Fourteenth Cup"The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince" Sixteenth Cup"The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince" Thirteenth Cup"Knight Rider" The Nineteenth Hole"Kong: The Animated Series" The Thirteenth Stone"Kraft Theatre" The Nineteenth HoleLaney's Eighteenth"Lights Out" Friday the NineteenthLouis the Fourteenth Street"Lupin the 3rd" The Coming of Goemon the Thirteenth"Lux Video Theatre" The Night of January Sixteenth"Marty's Corner" Thirteenth Anniversary Show"Matinee Theatre" The Nineteenth Hole"Matinee Theatre" The Thirteenth CryptMorgan and Destiny's Eleventeenth Date: The Zeppelin ZooMother Goose in a Sixteenth Century TheatreMy Sixteenth SummerNelson's Caribbean Hell-Hole: An Eighteenth Century Navy Graveyard Uncovered"Onmitsu kenshi" The Thirteenth Ninja"Out of This World" Evie's Thirteenth Birthday"Pageant Pom Mom" The First Annual Fourteenth Amendment We're Having Our Own Pageant Pageant: Pink and Purple Edition"Peter Pan and the Pirates" Friday the Thirteenth"Playdate" The Thirteenth Laird"Poltergeist: The Legacy" The Thirteenth GenerationProteus: A Nineteenth Century Vision"RahXephon" Thirteenth Movement: First Human Specimen/Sleeping Beauty"Robert Montgomery Presents" The Seventeenth of JuneScreenThru"Second Thoughts" Friday the Thirteenth"Seeing and Believing" Eighteenth and Twentieth - One Scientific Century Speaks to AnotherSeventeenthSeventeenth De-Century"Shiki" Eighteenth Death"Shiki" Fifteenth Deceit"Shiki" Fourteenth Death"Shiki" Nineteenth Coffin"Shiki" Seventeenth Killing Spirit"Shiki" Sixteenth Skull"Shiki" Thirteenth Tragedy"Ship to Shore" Friday the ThirteenthShriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth"Signpost" The Fifteenth Century: Part 1 - Fighting Men"Signpost" The Fifteenth Century: Part 2 - Cardinal Beaufort"Signpost" The Fifteenth Century: Part 3 - Margaret PastonSixteenthSpy Games: The Thirteenth Sector"Stage by Stage" The Eighteenth-Century Theatre"Star Tonight" The Big Fifteenth"Stupid Stupid Man" The Fifteenth FloorSummer of the Seventeenth Doll"Suspense" The Doors on the Thirteenth Floor"Sutherland's Law" The Thirteenth Man"Taggart" The Thirteenth Step"Target" The Thirteenth Juror"The Avengers" The Thirteenth Hole"The Big Blue Marble" My Seventeenth SummerThe Eighteenth AngelThe Eighteenth Century WomanThe Eighteenth HourThe FifteenthThe Fourteenth ManThe Fourteenth ManThe Fourteenth Winter"The Gale Storm Show: Oh! Susanna" Friday the Thirteenth"The Kick Vee Show" Streaming with Sarah: Nineteenth of August, Two-Thousand-Eighteen"The KirbyKip Show" Fwiday Teh Thirteenth: Fwends #1"The Larry Sanders Show" The Fourteenth Floor"The Law Centre" Friday the Thirteenth"The Mighty B!" So Happy Together/Sweet SixteenthThe Nineteenth Century Novel and Its Legacy"The Nineteenth Century Novel and Its Legacy" GerminalThe Nineteenth Hole"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.1"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.2"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.3"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.4"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.5"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.6"The Nineteenth Hole" Episode #1.7"The Philco Television Playhouse" Friday the Thirteenth"#Killstream" #Killstream: May Fourteenth, Two-Thousand-Eighteen"The Rifleman" The Sixteenth CousinThe Seventeenth Kind"The Simpsons" 'Tis the Fifteenth SeasonThe Sixteenth FloorThe Sixteenth MinuteThe Sixteenth Wife"The Spread of the Eagle" The Fifteenth: Julius Caesar Acts 2, 3 and 4"The Ten Commandments" The Nineteenth HoleThe ThirteenthThe Thirteenth CandleThe Thirteenth ChairThe Thirteenth ChairThe Thirteenth ChairThe Thirteenth CommandmentThe Thirteenth Day: The Story of EstherThe Thirteenth FloorThe Thirteenth GirlThe Thirteenth Girl's Adventure in Nengren TempleThe Thirteenth GuestThe Thirteenth HourThe Thirteenth HourThe Thirteenth Hour"The Thirteenth Hour" Wide AwakeThe 13th JurorThe Thirteenth ManThe Thirteenth ManThe Thirteenth PrisonerThe Thirteenth SeedThe Thirteenth StepThe Thirteenth TaleThe Thirteenth Year"Theatre Night" Summer of the Seventeenth DollThirteenth Dimension"Thursday Theatre" Summer of the Seventeenth Doll"Time for Murder" The Thirteenth Day of Christmas"Touched by an Angel" The Sixteenth MinuteTwo Faces of the Seventeenth Century"Vlogbrothers" Memo to the Fourteenth Century (and to the Tobians)"Wheelie and the Chopper Bunch" Friday the Thirteenth/Wings of Wheelie/Wheelie's Clean Sweep"Wizards vs. Aliens" The Thirteenth Floor, Part One"Wizards vs. Aliens" The Thirteenth Floor, Part Two

...no?  Nothing?  Not even close?  Well then, I guess it's all just BACK TO THE PEACEFUL SEA THEN!!!  I MEAN, BACK TO THE GROVELING BOARD THEN!!!  Drawing board; Ooo0*@%Q¤©®ºÒÓÔÕÖØÞðòóôõöøþCCCCDÐGGGGŒ?OOOUUUUUUÐOOOO‰@8ØÔþøöõôóðëêéèçæåäãâßÞÜÛÚÙØ×ÖÕԣܢoopoops... sorry about shouting.  I gotta go, take my anti-histrionics again.  Usually the second round does the trick.

No comments: