Welp, let's get to that Box Office report again. We've got a couple... how about
Scarlett Cleitt?... we've got a couple debuts this week, so let's just dive right in to that pool. At #1, it's... well, we need a little bit of historical context here. First, there was
Eat Pray Love, then there was the first thing to make fun of it on the sliver... silver screen, called
Crazy Stupid Love. There probably needs to be periods after each word in that, but I don't care yet. That's another stupid trend. Anything to drive grade school English teachers crazy goes today. I know I
should be a fan, but I'm not. The other thing is turning "crazy" into the new "very." Crazy healthy, crazy fast... that kinda sh... oe leather. And so we get
Crazy Rich Asians. The guy who stars in that, Jimmy O. Yang, went on "The Daily Show" to flog his wares... and hey! It worked! Number one domestic, albeit not by much. Not since
The Joy Luck Club has there been an all-Asian cast like this. That's right, Jackie Chan, no love for you. Yes, everybody who's anybody in the Asian film community was in this. Not my Queen
Li Gong, however. Either she wasn't invited, or she's too big for the likes of this. Nor
Bai Ling, for that matter (my trainwreck). I guess the Chinese don't count here. That includes
Ziyi Zhang, of
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon fame, and others.
Rush Hour 2, for example. Hey, they can't help it if their current president is a honey-eating douchebag!
The second debut this week is the latest collaboration between Peter Berg and Mark Wahlberg. Nuff said. The last debut this week is something called
Alpha, and...
Albert Hughes? JUST Albert? But what about Allen? What is he, chopped liver? Oh, I don't care for this. I just don't care for this at all. These two gotta patch things up. They gotta patch that sh... oe leather up right now. Oh well. Clearly, Albert is the alpha in this dyad. Game changed for me. Paradigm shifted, head kicked in. World truly turned upside down now. Gotta go.
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