Sunday, March 18, 2018

Auteur Watch - C. A. Griffith

Be careful when you search for his or hers... their name on my beloved IMDb.  Don't put spaces in between his her their pretentious first initials like I did.  Do it like this: C.A. Griffith, not C. A. Griffith.  Welp, long story short, having gotten a taste of fictional stories like with Del Otro Lado, it was time to move on to the more non-fictional realm of the documentary.

Boggling the Mind

And another 18th of the month has come and gone.  Only about 13 more years of this, unfortunately!  See, once you get to 2032 and beyond, well... you just can't do that anymore!  You just can't do it!  I mean, you just can't!  In the year 2032, you can't say "Well, it's March 32nd, 2032!  The only one there will ever be in the history of this Earth as we know it..."  But maybe the Republican-controlled Congress will get on that.  They're taking up Daylight Saving, after all, and not just on "Veep".
Anyway, on to the real news.  Never mind the high-profile White House firings, that's for others... but I will say that one of the headlines is that Republicans are warning Trump not to fire Mueller, the Special Counsel in charge of the Russia investigation... I put in that little extra in case I reread this five years from now, and not know who the hell I was typing about.  Could happen!  Doesn't seem like it now.  But that's one difference from the Nixon era: his fellow Republicans had no idea that Nixon was going to do so much high-profile firing.  It was a bridge too far for most of them.  Nowadays they just give warnings.  Speaking of nostalgia, the latest incarnation of Tomb Raider came in at #2 this weekend.  Apparently it was old news and old hat; people still want to see Black Panther, as it happens.  No one cares about a 20-something year-old video game.  Then of course there's all those who prefer the Angelina Jolie version.  No national outlet for them to be outraged, apparently.
At #3, it's the latest triumph for Christian cinema, not involving Mel Gibson.  It's a movie called I Can Only Imagine, and from what I can tell from the plot description, it's a movie about a chart-topping song by a group called MercyMe.  I guess it's doing so well that, unlike films like Jersey Boys and Ray, they went ahead and did a movie about one song.  Or even Beyond the Sea, but we're probably not supposed to mention that one ever again.  Those were movies about a person's or a group's whole body of work, not just one song.  And besides... I thought the deal with Jesus was that you have to accept him as your savior, either professional or personal... probably both.  You're not supposed to imagine what it would be like!  You're just supposed to DO it!  Imagining is for heathens, like those fallen Big Idea types who make evil moving pictures about talking vegetables.
At #5, it's something called Love, Simon based on a novel called "Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda."  Where's the risk?  Why do movies corrupt certain novels like that?  Take these two Steve Carell movies.  One's called Seeking a Friend for the End of the World.  It's on Netflix (TM) (R) currently, I believe.  The other is called Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.  Now, I'm pretty sure the average American moviegoer went up to that ticket booth and said "Four for 'Alexander', please!"  Or did I miss the ad campaign?  Did they have some type of deal where you say the whole title to the ticket giver, and it's half off the admission price?  The point being, those are two long-ass titles, man!  Okay, the Seeking a Friend one's apparently not based on a book... (cough - Omega Man) ...but they kept the title long!  Where's the risk taking?  Sigh.  I will admit that the Simon they got is dreamy enough... I guess.  I just couldn't sit through the trailers they ran during "The Daily Show."  Ooh!  Which reminds me.  Before I go, one request... Trevor Noah cameo in the Black Panther sequel?  Is that asking so much?

Sunday, March 11, 2018

Auteur Watch - Eddie Griffin

Like I need to tell you, when you're a celebrity like Eddie Griffin, mere film or TV directing just will not do.  A guy like that's gotta do it all, especially "Soundtrack" stuff.  He'd probably prefer to be in the music business, but whatever.  Two of his IMDb Top 4 involve him as a comedian, which is all right with him.  The third is, of course, the iconic Undercover Brother.  Which is okay, but he'd rather probably be known for more bad-ass fare like Double Take.  But he's still got skin in the game, playing "Pastor" in the new A Star is Born reboot.  Lady Gaga's in it, but she's probably not interested... yet!  Hope springs eternal.  I suggest opening with your old genealogical question: "Got any black in you?" then waiting a beat, and follow up with the follow-up question "Want some?"  What fellow big-time celebrity wouldn't be impressed by that?

One With the Ladies

And so, how did the massive ad campaign for Disney's A Wrinkle in Time pan out?... Ouch.  As the numbers tell us, Black Panther is still #1.  But Spielberg's Ready Player One is hoping to change that next weekend!  He seemed a little depressed at the Oscars (TM) last weekend.  But if Ready Player One does good enough, they'll let him hand out an Oscar next year, maybe.  But back to A Wrinkle in Time.  Even though it didn't beat Black Panther, I think everyone involved will probably get to work again.  Director Ava DuVernay, for example, is... WHAT?!!! ARE YOU NUTS??!!!!  Her next project is a TV Movie.  ARE YOU INSANE?!?!!!!!????!!!  You've just conquered the silver screen, girlfriend!  And now you're going to throw it all away!  On a TV movie about the battle of Versailles, no less!  Tentatively titled "Battle of Versailles."  ...oh!  Just read the plot description.  Sounds a little more like Battle of the Sexes than a war epic about... about World War I.  The least obscure battle to come up on Wikipedia.  Man, oh for two today!  But the main thing to remember is DuVernay's next project is about 1) the Beautiful People, and 2) the 1970s.  Oh, if only these two subjects would ever get the respect they deserve, from Hollywood in general and from the world in particular.
...ooh!  Did you notice?  They finally fixed the underlining problem that was plaguing the internet up until now.  For you see, up until now, in the whole history of the Internets, that series of tubes we all continually rely upon for everything from automated control of our public infrastructure to the Huffington Post's Pulitzer-Prize-worthy sideboob pics, when you had the dangling lowercase letters, they had to fight with the underline.  Well, not anymore.  As David Letterman would say, before he had his award-worthy Netflix show, made in small batches by contented artisans, you've got your 'g' (ding), you got your 'j' (ding), you got your klmno (loud, annoying buzz)... 'p' (ding)  You got your 'q' (ding), rstuvwx (loud annoying buzz), and finally, you got your "y" (ding).  None of the uppercase letters has this problem.  But hey!  What about the special characters like that douche-y "|" vertical line thing?  (ding)  Well, this must've been some kind of internal font fix or something, but whoever did it is going to make a "million damn dollars," again as Letterman used to say.  Seriously, he would really run certain phrases into the ground.  Say, how much do you weigh?  And what do you think of your old buddy Clinton there?  Okay, underline off.  Ooh, can't wait to see how that looks!
At #3 this week, our second debut is the latest horror movie, and it's called The Strangers: Prey at Night... Tyler Perry isn't involved in this, is he?  He's got "The Family that Preys," as you all know.  You notice that he hasn't presented on the Oscars (TM) lately.  Well, he hasn't been allowed back ever since he quipped, in Woody Allen-style fashion, that that was as probably as close as he'd ever get to one.  And he cast Oscar(TM) winner Kathy Bates in one of his projects, for God's sake!  Oh, Oscar can be so cruel.  Anyway, so that was the second debut... meanwhile, whatever on Earth happened to that one movie?  One of Anton Yelchin's last, all over the IMDb the last few weeks... Thoroughbreds, that's it!  That was supposed to clean up this weekend!  What happened?  Well, we'll never know through the IMDb, thanks to their cutting off of the budget information.  Guess they got too many complaints.  Also, arguably they do have to try and cure film enthusiasts of their "budget fetishism," to coin a phrase.  I was part of the movement myself, I'll confess.  I mean, for a while there I just wouldn't see a movie that cost less than 300 million dollars.  But if it had "Transformers" in the title, sure, I'd skip those as well.
And the final debut this week is Rob Cohen's latest non-Vin Diesel-related megabomb, and it's called The Hurricane Heist.  Boy!  And I thought reading the Trivia page of Stealth was bad.  This one's going to be way, way worse.

Monday, March 05, 2018

Auteur Watch - Rashaad Ernesto Green

...oh, right!  Guess I should say / blog something about him.  Well, he seems to be well on his way to mainstream success, but he's got a long way to go before getting to David Gordon Green levels.  Also, given his model-ish looks he might want to consider acting fulltime instead of spreading his energy around to so many other side interests!  I mean, look at all these categories you can jump to: director, actor, producer, writer, editor... catering.  Always like to throw that one in.  Someday it'll be its own category as it deserves to be, as soon as Taylor Hackford has moved on to the big director's chair in the sky.
But it looks like TV directing is the way to go, and Rashaad has taken it.  I've actually heard of some of those shows!  We've got "Grimm" and... something else.  Jim Kouf got tired of writing about cops, and decided to move onto more ratings-friendly fare.  So there's "Grimm" and "The Vampire Diaries."  See, the nice thing about directing TV shows is that the titles are kinda grandfathered in.  The writers take care of all that stuff.  Usually titles will be taken from the world of rock stars.  Take his episode of "Supernatural" called "Thin Lizzie", for example.  The boys are back in town, indeed!  Or how about "One Way or Another," which used to be a Blondie song, but now it's a critical episode of "The Vampire Diaries."  Incidentally, is it just me, or is that horrible Imagine Dragons song "Lightning and Thunder" kind of a structural ripoff of Blondie's "One Way or Another"?  The internet for now is still far too text-based to pick up on sh.. stuff like that.  But in Rashaad's pre-TV period, he had a pretty good handle on titles.  Gun Hill Road is a great one, The Can Collector has potential; depends on the film itself, of course.  But Showtime?  C'mon.  I mean, we've already got 2002's Showtime with Eddie Murphy and Robert De Niro.  And I believe there's a whole channel called that.
Oh, but I probably complain too much.  Keep up the good work!  Use your position for good, and for shepherding the next generation into the world of film directing.

Oscars(TM) So Deakins?

Never thought I'd see that!  The Susan Lucci of the ASC, Roger Deakins, has FINALLY won an Oscar(TM)!  But I think, unlike Susan Lucci, people will still give a sh... still care about the work that Deakins does, has done, will continue to do.  Maybe I'm being too glib here, but it seemed like the Oscars have gone black... now they're going back!  I mean, God bless Frances McDormand and all that, but what was the average age of some of the winners?  Guillermo del Toro is 54, Deakins is almost 70, James Ivory is... older than Christopher Plummer?  Plummer looks like he's taken a little better care of himself.  I'll bet he does yoga or something.  Meanwhile, Rod Lurie wasn't happy.  In Facebookland, he posted something about a rapist winning an Oscar... but he didn't say which one.  I think he also declared the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements finished, something like that.  And maybe they are, but probably not.  Sorry, Rod, but your snappier snap judgments are a little too snappy sometimes.  Mira Sorvino and Ashley Judd aren't getting that much filmwork these days; they've got time to keep the momentum of these movements going.  And after all, this is Hollywood we're talking about!  It's about as rape-y a place as the Catholic church.  One of my customers didn't even watch the Oscars; too political, they said.  As for me, well... I guess it was no surprise that Gary Oldman would win... but I mean, really, isn't it the Oscar he should've gotten for Sid and Nancy?  Something like that?  Filmed by Deakins, incidentally!  It's all related; damn near incestuous, this business of film show.
But enough about the Oscars.  What about the Top 10 films this weekend?  We got Black Panther still going strong, Red Sparrow erasing the memory of Mother!, and we've got the new Death Wish.  As long as it's in the Top 10, I'll be curious about its director.  Turns out it's the Jew Bear himself, Eli Roth... that was his nickname in Inglourious Basterds, right?  ...forgive me, it's Sgt. Donny Donowitz, AKA "The Bear Jew."  I guess Jew Bear would be more like ... Harvey Fierstein, something like that.  ANYWAY... don't get me wrong, I'm happy for Roth and Bruce Willis and whoever else was involved... but really?  Plus, the character is now a surgeon, not an architect, so we can hope for some "Dexter"-like overtones, no?  He's a surgeon, right?  But alas, Eli's already hard at work defending his film, saying that it's "not pro-gun."  Well, the first one kinda was!  And I'm pretty sure Bruce Willis is, but he probably doesn't get any NRA money for his opinions.  I'll bet you one thing, though... I'm pretty sure there's no spraypainting of a naked bottom this time around.

Thursday, March 01, 2018

Short Reviews - March 2018

Well, I could go on with characters just named Frank forever, it seems, but it's probably time to move on to characters with last names.  A lot of those as well.  So let's get started and change some paradigms around here!

"Foyle's War" "The Funk Hole" - With Richard Hope as Frank Vaudrey

Fracchia Vs. Dracula - Con Romano Puppo come Frank...enstein

Fracture - With Cliff Curtis as Detective Frank...lin

Fractured Lies - With Brandon DeCardenas as Frank Lindel

Fragile Fish - With Frank Ellis Wells as Franky

Frame - With Frank (C.) Williams as Detective Harris

Frame - With Eric Riedmann as Frank

Frame of Mind - With David Dinkins as Seantor Franklin.  Also with... yeah, that's right!  MAYOR David Dinkins playing a Senator!  So clearly this is the more prestigious gig!  Also with Frank Gio as Johnny Loma; just another Goombah

Frame Up - With veteran of the Joe Dante Rolling Stock Company and a Generally Nutty Guy Otherwise Robert Picardo as Frank Govers.  Also with Frances Fisher as Jo Westlake.  Lighting Cameraman work by Francis Grumman.

Framed - With Frank Mills as Frank... the Waiter (uncredited)

Framed - With Paul Mantee as Frank

"Framed" - With Trevor Cooper as D. I. Frank Shrapnel (3 episodes... okay, technically ONE, but he does retain that great last name.  Must be Dutch/German/Austrian or something.  It's like an ice cream guy named Cone!)

Frames - With Roger Cardwell as Frank

Frames of Fear - With George Stover as Frank, Festering (segment eponymous)

Frames of Fear 2 (Fear Boogaloo) - With George Stover as Frank, Festering (segment "Wraparound")

Framing Frankie - With Anoucia Christina as Frankie Mendes

Francesca - With Debra Lopez as Frankie

"Francesco: Unintentional Wise Guy" - With Frank Massa as Frankie Cornuto (2 episodes)

Francis Goes to the Races - With Jesse White as Frank Damer........... also with Piper Laurie as Frances Travers.  Also with Molly as Francis the Talking Mule.  Also with Franklyn Farnum as Racetrack Spectator (uncredited).  Also with Chill Wills as Francis the Talking Mule (voice).  Music by Frank Skinner.  Why can't they ALL be this easy?!!!

Francis is a Lion - With Ryan Rehnborg as Frank

Franco Brocani - Cuore meccanico in corpo anonimo - Con Franco Brocani come Himself - Director.  Anche con Riccardo Reim come Himself - Actor / La creatura di Frankenstein / Clodio.  Anche con Franco Lecca come Himself - Director of Photography.  Anche con Bruno Corazzari come La creatura di Frankenstein (archive footage).  Mamma mia!

Franco: ese hombre - Con Francisco Franco como Himself.  También con Francisco Arenzana como (voice).  También con Francisco Largo Caballero como él mismo (tomas de archivo).  También con Francesc Macià como él mismo (tomas de archivo).  También con Franklin D(elano) Roosevelt como él mismo (tomas de archivo).

Frank 'N Beans - With Paul Pape as Frank... no one as Beans!!  I feel highly cheated.

Frank 'n' Stan - With Mishael Trestrail as Frank

"Frank 'N' Steve" - With Jonathan Canham as Frank (voice) (28 episodes)... and also Steve (voice) (28 episodes).  Is this guy the new Seth MacFarlane yet?

Frank - Med Fredrik Hiller som Frank

Frank - With Graham Fellows as Frank

Frank - With Steve Gelder as Frank O'Neill

Frank - With Jesse McDowell as Frank #1.  Also with Joseph Aniska as Frank #2.  Also with Tommy Bartlett as Frank #3.  Also with Charlie Plummer as Young Frank.  Co-written, co-directed, co-produced, co-edited, co-production-designed, co-sound-edited, colored, co-visual-effected, co-catered and also featuring as 'Anna's client #2 - bald guy' by Gian Franco Morini.  Also with production design and set decoration by Fernando Toscano.

Frank - With Darren Beaumont as Frank.  Also with Pat Dunn as Frank's Mother.  Also with visual effects by Nick Franco.

Frank - With Humphrey Waterhouse as Frank

Frank - With Kieran Hodgson as Frank

Frank - With Dillon Siedentopf as Frank

Frank - With Michael Fassbender as Frank... wow!  I've actually HEARD of this one!  Also with François Civil as Baraque, Tess Harper as Frank's Mom, Bruce McIntosh as Frank's Dad.  Crew: Robert Allsopp as Frank Head Modelmaker, Frank Hanna as digital compositor: Screen Scene, Frank Garcia as lighting technician, Frank Montoya as lighting technician, Elodie Demey as casting: France, Frank Moore as driver, and with Frank Sidebottom as dedicatee (as Chris Sievey... not ready yet to own his Frankness.  Maybe on the next show!  Frank 2: El-Frank-tric Boogaloo)

Frank - With Lee Thomson as Frank.  Also with Frank Ryan as The Doctor.

Frank - With Frank Aldridge as Frank (himself)

Frank - With Ross Brooks as Frank

Frank - With Ray Manahan as Frank.  Also with Trenton Tabor as Young Frank.

Frank - With Robert Harrison as Frank

Frank - With Dan Lauria as Frank

"Frank" - With Graham Bowe as Frank

"Frank" - With Robert Harrison as Frank.  Also with Alexander Baker as Young Frank.  Also with Joy McAvoy as Frank's Mother.

"Frank" - With James Chilli Chillingworth as Frank

Frank & Flo - With John Rutland as Frank

Frank & Jerry - With Benedict Hardie as Frank

Frank & Jesse - With Bill Paxton as Frank James

"The Frank & Judy Show" - With Charles Huddleston as Frank (as Charlie Huddleston)

"Frank & Lamar" - With Carl Foreman Jr. as Frank

Frank & Lola - With Johnny Acero as Frank

Frank & Lola - With Michael Shannon as Frank.  Also with Laine Rettmer as Françoise.  Property Master, Paris Unit: Frank Pitussi.  Foley mixer: Frank Rinella.  Stunts: Frank Trigg.  Chef Consultant: Frank Falcinelli.  Special Thanques: Frank Castronovo.

Frank & Mary - With David Holman as Frank

Frank & Suzie - With Jackie Liu as Frank

Frank & the Box - With Errich Petersen as Frank

"Frank Abagnale: Between Reality and Fiction" - With Frank (W.) Abagnale Jr. as Himself

Frank Advice - With Tom Segura as Frank

Frank and Ava - With Rico Simonini as Frank Sinatra.  Also with Luc Austin as Frank jr [sic].  Also with Dexter Cross as young Frank Sinatra.  Line Producer / Production Manager: Francesco Papa.

Frank and Barry - With Jake Millgard as Frank.  Also with Francisco Reyes as The Vampire.

Frank and Cindy - With Oliver Platt as Frank.  Also, incidentally, with Marc Maron as SOMEONE OTHER THAN HIMSELF.  Just sayin'.

"Frank and Ernie" - With John O'Creagh as Frank (4 episodes).  Also with Frank Mollica as Guard (1 episode).

Frank and Franklin - With Adam Harper as Frank... no one as Franklin, apparently.  Voice in Head?  Imaginary Best Friend?  Ghost only Frank can See?

"Frank and Jane" - With Stephen A. Chang as Frank Churchill (9 Episodes)

Frank and Kass - With Hidekun Hah as Frank

Frank and Marie - With John Cunningham as Frank

Frank and the Rabbit - With René Granado as Frank Bullseye

The Frank Anderson - With Richard Riehle as Frank Anderson.  Music by David Frank Long.

Frank Bishop's Wife - With Bruce Van Cott as Frank Bishop.  Also with Yarusha Jimenez as Frank Bishop's Wife (uncredited) and... UNCREDITED?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Frank BluE - With JayTee Thompson as Frank Blue / Lil Dirt.  Also with Joshua Russell as Frank Jr.

Frank Calls - With Adrian Espulso as Frank

"Frank Capra Jr. Remembers: Mr. Deeds Goes to Town" - With Frank Capra Jr. as ... himself

Frank Caruso P. I. - With Tim Halpin as Frank Caruso (P. I.)

Frank Comes Home - With Justin Possenti as Frank Capra.  Also with Kenneth Cuellar as Frankie Jr. Capra. (...that's the way THEY have it!  I'm just reporting what I see)  Special Thanks: Frank Capra III: The Return of Durant.

Frank DanCoolo: Paranormal Drug Dealer - With John Charles Meyer as Frank DanCoolo

Frank DeVol and His Orchestra - With Frank De Vol as Himself (as Frank DeVol)

Frank El Indomable - Mitt Federico Vega Leal como Frank

Frank Embree - With Skinner Myers as Frank Embree

Frank Fairfield - With Frank Fairfield as Frank Fairfield

"Frank Finds a Job" "Baking Bad" - With Jarred Shaffer as Frank Todd

Frank Finds Out - With Matt Nolan as Frank

Frank Flutie - With Josh Mitchell as Frank Flutie

Frank Gehry: An Architecture of Joy - With Frank Gehry as Himself (as Frank O. Gehry)

Frank Gehry: The Formative Years - With Frank Gehry as Himself (as Frank O. Gehry)

Frank Georges and the Truth - With Lucky Douglas as Frank Georges

"Frank Hardon: Life Coach" - With Curtis Eastwood as Frank Hardon (6 episodes)

Frank Hates You - With Michael Racanelli as Frank.  Also with Frank Sjodin as Cop 2.

Frank Holcomb: The H. R. Rep - With Chad Mitchell as Frank Holcomb

"Frank Hurley: The Man Who Made History" - With John Noble as Frank Hurley (voice).  Also with Frank Hurley as Himself (archive footage).  Oh, this Frank Hurley, he's good... but he's not John Noble good!

"The Frank International Film Festival" - With Fred Armisen as Frank.  Also with Ron Lynch as Frank's Uncle, and Derek Waters as Frank's Brother.

"Frank Leaves for the Orient" - With Stan Cahill as Frank (6 episodes).  Also with Janet Carroll as Frank's Mom (2 episodes!!) and Richard Roat as Frank's Dad (1 episode).

"Frank McCuff: Police Force Vigilante" - With Alexander J. Diaz as Frank McCuff Jr.

Frank McKlusky, C. I. - With Dave Sheridan as Frank McKlusky (C. I.).  Also with Sawyer and Sullivan Sweeten as Young Frank.  Also with Franklin Hernandez as Pancho, and Frank Hudetz as Film Director (uncredited).  SECOND Second Assistant Director: Franklyn Gottbetter (actually got a lot worse).  Special Effects Technician: Johnny Franco III.  Extras casting: Central Casting: Franklyn Warren (as Franklin Warren).

Frank Mills - With Ryan Babbs as Frank Mills

"Frank Nitti: The Enforcer" - With Anthony LaPaglia as Frank Nitti.  Also with Frank Schuller.

Frank Norton - With Leopold Bauer as Frank Norton

"Frank Pappa Show" - With Heimo Holopainen as Frank Pappa (unknown episodes)

"Frank Pierre Presents: Pierre Resort & Casino" - With Ray Wise as Frank Pierre.  Produced by Franny Baldwin.  Cinematography by Frank 'Chainsaw' Barrera.

Frank Reaugh: Pastel Poet of the Texas Plains - With Robert Magruder as Frank Reaugh (voice)

"Frank Riva" - With Alain Delon as Frank Riva (6 episodes).  Also with François Vincentelli as Steve Buscemi Guy 'Guido' Buscema (6 episodes).  Also with Venantino Venantini as Francesco 'Francis' Melfi (4 episodes).  Also with Franklin Torres as Rojas (2 episodes).  Also with Francine Olivier as Mme. Kolescu (1 episode).  Also with Francis Frappat as Dr. Émile Strobe (1 episode).  Also with Angelo Aybar as Francisco Arau (1 episode).  Stunts by François Schetelat (2 episodes).

"The Frank Rosenthal Show" "Episode dated 22 August 1977" - With Frank 'Lefty' Rosenthal as Himself - Host (as Frank Rosenthal)... yes, THIS 'Lefty' Rosenthal

Frank Saves the Day - With Alex Endeshaw as Frank

"Frank Sidebottom's Fantastic Shed Show" - With Frank Sidebottom as Frank Sidebottom (7 Episodes)

"The Frank Sinatra Show" - With Frank Sinatra as Himself - Host (32 episodes).  Also with Jesse White as Frank's Manager (4 episodes... okay 3 as Frank's Manager, 1 as someone called "Marty Potter"... possibly Frank's Manager).  Also with Frank Albertson as Himself (1 episode).  Also with Frank Baker as Townsman (uncredited) (1 episode).  Also with Leon Lontoc as Leon... Frank's Servant (uncredited) (1 episode).  Sound by Frank Goodwin (10 episodes, 1957-1958).  Also with Dave White as Stand-In: Frank Sinatra (6 episodes, 1957-1958).

"Frank Solich Show" - With Frank Solich as Himself - Host (as Coach Frank Solich)... no wonder the show didn't last!  No crew!

"Frank Stubbs" - With Timothy Spall as Frank Stubbs (13 episodes)

Frank the Assassin - With Zack Sztanyo as Frank the Assassin

Frank the Assassin Goes on a Date - With Zack Sztanyo as Frank the Assassin

Frank the Bastard - With Andy Comeau as Frank.  Hair Department head: ......... Frank the Bastard.  For more information about Frank the Bastard, consult your local library.

"Frank the Entertainer in a Basement Affair" - With Frank Maresca as Himself (9 episodes).  Also with Jeremy Fernandez as Frank Jr. Kid (2 episodes).

Frank the Rat - With Kevin Hogan as Frank.  Also with Frank Senger as Joe, and P. J. Sosko as Young Frank.

Frank the Uber (TM)(C)(R) Driver - With Bryan Straka as Frank Stokes

The Frank Truth - With Michael Bate as Himself - FRANK Publisher and Editor.  Also with some others who clearly are not the head honcho here... Alan Martin as Himself - FRANK Employee, Steve Collins as Himself - FRANK Employee, Glen McGregor as Himself - Ex-FRANK Employee, Bruce MacDonald as Himself - FRANK Delivery Guy, Charles Jaffé as Himself - FRANK Cartoonist, Geoff Heinricks as Himself - Ex-FRANK Employee, Jeff Wells as Himself - FRANK Satirist, and Will McDowell as Himself - FRANK Legal Counsel.  For more information about Frank magazine, go to... I'm going to say

"Frank V. - Die Oper einer Privatbank" - Mit Hubert von Meyerinck als Frank V.  Auch mit Barbara Schöne als Franziska.

Frank vs. God - With Henry Ian Cusick as David Frank.  Also with Lauren O'Quinn as Candy Frank, Ricky Wayne as Billy Frank, Heather Natoli as Heather Frank (as Heather Dodson).  Also with Cameron Francis as Cop.

Frank Was a Monster Who Wanted to Dance - With Michael Dobson as Frank (voice) (as Michael R. Dobson).  Also with Chris Ainscough, Justin James, Tiffany Jones, Nick Lainas, Adrienne Pierce, Geoff Richardson, Mark Scott, Michelle Smith, Michael Stewart,
and Sam Vincent as "thanks: Lost Boys wishes to thank everyone who has generously donated their time, advice, energy and talent, 'Frank...' would not have been possible without you."

"Frank Zito's Night of Frights" - With Jake Robinson as Frank Zito

The Frank-Can-Stein Monster - With Brandon McEnturff as Frank-Can-Stein

Frank-Étienne vers la béatitude - Avec Gérard Depardieu son Frank-Étienne Boulard

"Frank, My Dad" - With Martin Sinicák as Frank

Frank! - With Michael Bates as Frank

Frank? - With Michael Loprete as Frank / New Improved Frank.  Written and directed by Frank H. Woodward.

Frank's 21st Birthday - With Peter Stoia as Frank

Frank's Angel - With Rod McCary as Frank

Frank's Ark - With Whett Wheetie as Frank

Frank's Christmas Carol Emporium - With Hal Rudnick as Frank

Frank's Dead - With Ted LeBlang as Frank Conner

"Frank's First Love" - With Daeg Faerch as Frank

Frank's First Movie - With Frank DiNicola as Frank, the Freshman.  Also directed, co-written, co-produced, co-edited and co-catered by Frank DiNicola... who does this guy think he is, John Sayles?  Or M. Night Shyamalan?

Frank's Fun Filled Friday Night - With Nick Allan as Frank

Frank's Inertia - With Rodrig Andrisan as Frank

Frank's Last Dance - With Jon Polito as Frank.  Co-produced and co-cinematographied by Francis Kenny.

Frank's Last Shot - With John Walpole as Frank       (as Trey Walpole)

Frank's Letter - With Matthew Saliba as Younger Frank Black.  Also with John Thomas as Older Frank Black.

"Frank's Place" - With Tim Reid as Frank Parrish (22 episodes).  Also with Francesca P. Roberts as Anna-May (22 episodes), and with Frances E. Williams as Miss Marie (22 episodes).

"Frank's Place" "The Bum Out Front" - Directed by Frank Bonner

"Frank's Place" "Disengaged" - With Carl Franklin as Father Phil

"Frank's Place" "Cultural Exchange" - With Francis Awe as African Group

"Frank's Place" "Night Business" - With William Frankfather as Father

"Frank's Place" "Dueling Voodoo" - With Armelia McQueen as Franny Nugent

Frank's Plight - With Michael David Marshall as Frank

Frank's Song - With Frank Wesley as Frank Wesley

"Franka: zhena Khama" - With Hanna Dunowska as Franka.  Also with Inna Alenikova as Franka's Mother.

Frankenbabe - With Robin Bain as Frankenbabe

Frankenbeans - With Stephen Sonneveld as Frankenbeans (voice)

Frankenberg - Mit Volkert Kraeft als Christian von Frankenberg (27 Episodes).  Auch mit Adele Landauer als Charlotte von Frankenberg (27 episodes).  Auch mit Natascha Bub als Lissy von Frankenberg (27 episodes).  Auch mit Fiona Molloy als Katharina von Frankenberg (27 Episodes).  Auch mit Ralf Komorr als Nick von Frankenberg (27 Episodes).  Auch mit Julian Hennek als Justus von Frankenberg (27 episodes).  Make-up von Francois Ettinger (unknown episodes) ... verdammt Französisch

Frankenchicken - With Michael R. Curtis as Igor / Frankenchicken / Ninjas (as Michael Curtis)

Frankenchicken - With Troy Planet as Frankenchicken / CAC Executive No. One (voice)

Frankendancer - Hold me closer, Frankendancer... I mean, with Thomas Callahan as Dr. Franklin

"Frankenheimer in Focus" - With John Frankenheimer as himself (archive footage).  Also with Evans Evans as Herself, John Frankenheimer's wife (as Evans Frankenheimer), Kristi Frankenheimer as Herself, John Frankenheimer's daughter, and Frank Mancuso, Jr. as Himself.  Sound recordist: Frank Zambetti.

Frankenhood - With Charlie Murphy as Franklin (as Charles Q. Murphy), and Bob Sapp as Frankie.  Music by Frankie Blue.

Frankenhooker - With David Lipman as Frankenhooker's Trick.  Directed and co-written by Frank Henenlotter, who also appears as Passenger (uncredited) and did some additional photography... which was probably catered by him.  Executive in Charge of Production: Frank K. Isaac.  Structural Carpenter: Frank Guglielmo.  Production Assistant: Frank D'Aurio Jr..

Frankenkinder - With Marla Dallman as Baby Frank

Frankenpants - With Hudson Jasper as Doctor Henry Von Frankenpants / Receptionist.  Also with Linnea Rainford as Sam Von Frankenpants.

"Frankenpenis" - With John Wayne Bobbitt as Frankenpenis.  Also with Veronica Brazil as Bride of Frankenpenis and Ron Jeremy as... oops.  You know, I try to avoid this sort of thing, believe it or not.  Even in this day and age.  But John Wayne Bobbitt was a big deal at one time.  I remember, because all the late night talk shows at the time went... let's just say they noticed the story.  Why, I believe even Billy Connolly said it's like... because his name is John Wayne, it's like you're, um... let's say, maiming the duke.  And... wait.  Did I see that correctly?  Ice-T is in this turkey?  Why... why is Ice-T in this turkey?  Nice, clean-cut Ice-T?  Oh well.  I don't understand it.  It's like he's trying to stay on the fringes of showbiz.  But even Sylvester Stallone and Sophia Loren started out in skin flicks, I guess.  Why not Ice as well.

Frankenpimp - With Danny Fisher as Dr. Frank N. Swine.  Special thanks: David J. Francis and ... really?  Frank MillerTHE Frank Miller?  As in Frank Miller Frank Miller?  Well, better this than a Merchant Ivory production, I guess.

And of course, the sequel: Frankenpimp's Revenge: The Romeo and Juliet Massacre - With Francesco De Francesco as Chico the Dockside John (as FRANKIE de Francesco).  Also co-directed by Francesco De Francesco.  Special thanks: Jesús Franco.

Frankenstein '80 - With Gordon Mitchell as Dr. Otto Frankenstein.  Also with Xiro Papas as Mosaic... the Frankenstein Monster.

Frankenstein (1910) - With Augustus Phillips as Frankenstein (uncredited)

Frankenstein (1931) - With Colin Clive as Henry Frankenstein, and with Frederick Kerr as Baron Frankenstein.  Also with Francis Ford as Hans (uncredited).  Screenplay by Francis Edward Faragoh.  Props by Franz Dallons (uncredited).  Electrical Effects Assistant: Frank Graves (uncredited).

Frankenstein (2011) - With Benedict Cumberbatch AND Jonny Lee Miller as The Creature / Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Haydon Downing as William Frankenstein (as Hayden Downing), Will Nye as William Frankenstein (as William Nye), Jared Richard as William Frankenstein, and George Harris as M. Frankenstein... oh, this was a stage production, so it might not count.  Oh well.

Frankenstein (2011) - With Lee Godwin as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Kayla Elizabeth as Elizabeth Frankenstein, Chris Party as William Frankenstein (as Chris Wietrzykowski), and Haydon Downing as William Frankenstein.

Frankenstein (2014) - With David Finlay as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Anastasia Bruce-Jones as Elizabeth Frankenstein.

...what's kind of interesting about this group, from probably strictly a numerological perspective, is a lot of these titles' IMDb numbers end in the same two digits... okay, only two groups of two, but still!

Frankenstein - With Adrian Pezdirc as Victor Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein" - With Mark Jax as Victor Frankenstein's father (2 episodes).  Also with Peter Simun as Father Francis (2 episodes).  Also with Frantisek Trochta as Officer #1 (2 episodes).  Also with Daniel Williams as William Frankenstein (2 episodes).  Post-production Coordinator (2 Episodes, 2004): Frank Sharp.

"Frankenstein" - With Robert Powell as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Terence Alexander as Alphonse Frankenstein.  Also with Graham McGrath as William Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein" - With Carl Beck as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Oliver Osterberg as Alphonse Frankenstein (as Ollie Osterberg).

"Frankenstein" - With Patrick Bergin as Dr. Victor Frankenstein.  Stunts (as Franklin Henson): Mark Henson.

...all right, fun part's over, numerologically speaking.

"Frankenstein" - With Helen McCrory as Dr. Victoria Frankenstein.

Frankenstein 1970 - With Boris Karloff as Baron Victor von Frankenstein.  Also with Franz Roehn as Cab Driver (uncredited).  Sound: Francis E. Stahl.

Frankenstein 2000 - Ritorno dalla morte - With Mark Frank as Kurt.  Also with Martin Dansky as Dr. Frankenstein.

Frankenstein 90 - Avec Jean Rochefort son Victor Frankenstein, et Eddy Mitchell son Frank.  Costume Design by: Françoise Disle.  Production Assistant (as Jean-Francois Geneux): Jean-François Geneix... hmm.  Must be a French production or sumpthin'.

Frankenstein all'italiana - With Gianrico Tedeschi as Dr. Frankenstein.  Co-written by: Massimo Franciosa.

Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell - With Peter Cushing as Baron Frankenstein.  Writing credits: Mary Shelley(character: Frankenstein) (uncredited).

"Frankenstein and the Vampyre: A Dark and Stormy Night" - With Miroslav Zaruba as Frankenstein monster       (uncredited).

Frankenstein Conquers the World - With Kôji Furuhata as Frankenstein.  Also with Kenichiro Kawaji as Young Frankenstein.

Frankenstein Created Woman - With... you know, I hate to editorialize here, but I bee-LEAVE this is what scientists refer to as "scope creep," or what pundits and some regular folk refer to as, um... "hyperbole"?  I'm just saying I think woman was created long before Frankenstein came on the scene.  Anyway, with  Peter Cushing as Baron Frankenstein.  Guess he made four of these.  Guess they couldn't exactly make one called Frankenstein Has Risen From the Grave.

The Frankenstein Files: How Hollywood Made a Monster - With Colin Clive as Henry Frankenstein       (archive footage) (uncredited).  Also with Peter Cushing as Dr. Frankenstein       (archive footage) (uncredited).  Also with Basil Rathbone as Baron Wolf von Frankenstein (archive footage) (uncredited).  Body: Frankenstein Monster: Howard Berger.  Charcoal Portrait: Frankenstein Monster (as Dominick Alvarez): Nick Damon.  Body: Frankenstein Monster: Robert Kurtzman.  Charcoal Portrait: Frankenstein Monster: Lenny Liff.  Body: Frankenstein Monster (as Gregory Nicotero) / Body: Frankenstein Monster: Greg Nicotero.  Sculptor: Frankenstein Busts: Mike Teves.

"Frankenstein from the Royal Ballet" - With Federico Bonelli as Doctor Frankenstein (as Frederico Bonelli).

Frankenstein General Hospital - With Mark Blankfield as Dr. Bob Frankenstein.  Also with Jonathan Farwell as Dr. Frank Reutgar.  Also with Michael Franco as Brad.

Frankenstein GPS - With Rocko Ferrera as Frankenstein.

Frankenstein in Love - With Rikka Bonnell as Bride of Frank.  Also with Brent Teclaw as Frank.

Frankenstein Island - With John Carradine as Dr. Frankenstein.  Also with Katherine Victor as Sheila Frankenstein von Helsing.

Frankenstein JR. - With Brent Beebe as Frankenstein Jr..  Also with Patrick Lazzara as Frankenstein (voice) (as Pat Lazzara).

Frankenstein Junior: Director Fan's Cut - With Sergio Danzi as Dr. Frankenstein.  Directed by: Franco Masselli.  Produced and Directed by: Franco Masselli.  Writing Credits: Franco Masselli... and MARY SHELLEY?????!!!!!!!!!!!

Frankenstein Meets the Spacemonster - With Robert Reilly as Col. Frank Saunders / Frankenstein.  Writing credits:  Oh, I don't know... maybe MARY SHELLEY?????!!!!!!!!!!

Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man - With Ilona Massey as Baroness Elsa Frankenstein.  Also with Patric Knowles as Dr. Frank Mannering.  Also with Don Barclay as Franzec.  Composer: Stock Music (uncredited): Frank Skinner.

The Frankenstein Monster Project - With Kelsey Zukowski as The Bride of Frankenstein.  Also with Oliver Morton as The Frankenstein Monster.

Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed - With Peter Cushing as Baron Frankenstein.  Also with Frank Middlemass as Guest - Plumber.  Writing credits: Mary Shelley (character: Frankenstein) (uncredited).

Frankenstein Reborn - With Rhett Giles as Dr. Victor Frank.  Designer: Frankenstein / Special Effects Coordinator / Special Effects Makeup / Special Effects Technician: Dan Kaplan.  Writing credits:  Oh, I don't know... maybe MARY SHELLEY?????!!!!!!!!!!

"Frankenstein Reborn: The Making of a Hammer Classic" - With Peter Cushing as Victor Frankenstein (archive footage).  Writing credits:  Oh, I don't know... maybe MARY SHELLEY?????!!!!!!!!!!

Frankenstein REC - With... hmm!  Nobody in it yet!  Except this Harry Potter-lookin' dude with bad skin.  Moron this later

Frankenstein Rising - With Gary Jazon as Vincent Frankson (as Gary Brandt).  Also with Domiziano Arcangeli as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Anita Page as Elizabeth Frankenstein.  Also with Shevaun Kastl as 1800 Elizabeth Frankenstein.  Also with Serena Lorien as Elizabeth Frankenstein (voice).  Special Thanks: Franz Schmulzer.  Writing credits: Mary Shelley (characters by).

The Frankenstein Story - With Donald F. Glut as Frankenstein Monster (as Don Glut).  Also with Charles Martinka as Dr. Frankenstein.

Frankenstein Therapy - With Tom Siedle as Dr. Henry Frankenstein.

Frankenstein vs. the Creature from Blood Cove - With Lawrence Furbish as Frankenstein's Monster.

"Frankenstein, Jr. and the Impossibles" - With Ted Cassidy as Frankenstein, Jr. (unknown episodes)  Series Writing Credits: Eddie Brandt ("Frankenstein Jr." Stories) (unknown Episodes).

"Frankenstein, MD" - With Anna Lore as Victoria Frankenstein (24 Episodes).  Production Assistant (8 Episodes, 2014): Bryant Francis.

Frankenstein: A Cinematic Scrapbook - With Ralph Bates as Victor Frankenstein (archive footage).  Also with Whit Bissell as Prof. Frankenstein (archive footage), Colin Clive as Dr. Henry Frankenstein (archive footage), Gary Conway as Bob (Teenage Monster) / Tony (Teenage Frankenstein) (archive footage), Whit Bissell as Prof. Frankenstein (archive footage), Joseph Cotten as Baron Frankenstein (archive footage), Peter Cushing as Victor Frankenstein / Dr. Carl Victor (archive footage),  Cedric Hardwicke as Dr. Frankenstein (archive footage), Boris Karloff as The Monster / Doctor Gustav Niemann / Dr. Henry Jekyll / Mr. Hyde / Baron Victor von Frankenstein (archive footage), Sandra Knight as Trudy Morton... Frankenstein's Daughter (archive footage), Donald Murphy as Oliver Frank / Frankenstein (archive footage), Rosalba Neri as Tania Frankenstein (archive footage), Narda Onyx as Dr. Maria Frankenstein (archive footage), Basil Rathbone as Baron Wolf von Frankenstein (archive footage), and Gene Wilder as Dr. Frankenstein (archive footage).

"Frankenstein: A Modern Myth" - With Benedict Cumberbatch AND Jonny Lee Miller as Himself / Frankenstein / The Monster.

"Frankenstein: Birth of a Monster" - With David Schofield as Frankenstein's Monster.  Also with Ronan Vibert as Victor Frankenstein.

Frankenstein: Day of the Beast - With Adam Stephenson as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Frank Warpeha as Felix.

Frankenstein: Heart of a Champion - With Jeffrey Alan Solomon as Vic Frank.

"Frankenstein: The College Years" - With Vincent Hammond as Frank N. Stein.

Frankenstein: The Metal Opera - Live - With Roy Ryan as Victor Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein: The True Story" - With Leonard Whiting as Dr. Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Margaret Leighton as Francoise DuVal.

'Frankenstein: Through the Eyes of the Monster' - With Tim Curry as Dr. Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein: Une histoire d'amour" - Avec Gérard Berner son Frankenstein.  Adaptation et Dialogue: François Chevallier... hmm!  Their IMDb #s are similar... tres chair de poule!

Frankenstein's Cat - With Keith Wickham as Dr. Frankenstein / Mr. Crumble / Pipsquawk (30 episodes).

Frankenstein's Daughter - With Donald Murphy as Oliver Frank / Frankenstein.  Chief Electrician: Frank Leonetti.

Frankenstein's Fatal Flying Guillotine - With Terence Lee Cover as Frankenstein.

Frankenstein's Great Aunt Tillie - With Donald Pleasence as Victor Frankenstein / Old Baron Frankenstein.  Also with Yvonne Furneaux as Matilda 'Tillie' Frankenstein.  Art Direction by: Francisco Magallón.

Frankenstein's Hungry Dead - With Michael Thurber as Dr. Frankenstein.  Very Special Thanks: Jesús Franco.

Frankenstein's Light - With John Jay Boda as Dr. Frankenstein.  Also with Sarah Doar as Aunt Frances.

Frankenstein's Monster - With Mike McAlpine as Frankenstein.  Writing Credits... oh, I don't know... MARY SHELLEY???????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Frankenstein's Monster - With Dustin Sturgill as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with James Sturgill as William Frankenstein.  Thanks: Charlie Franklin.

Frankenstein's Patchwork Monster - With Bill Kennedy as Dr. Viktor Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein's Wedding... Live in Leeds" - With Andrew Gower as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Mark Williams as Alphonse Frankenstein.

Frankensteinin Lapsi - With Risto Honkasalmi as Viktor Frankenstein.  Also with Vincent Kinnunen as Frankensteinin lapsi / Child of Frankenstein.

"Frankensteins Schwiegermutter" - Mit Karl-Heinz Gierke als Viktor Frankenstein.  Auch mit Bärbel Schöller als Frankensteins Sekretärin.  Auch mit Jürgen Schaak als Frankensteins Monster.

Frankenström - Med Niklas Österholm som Vihtori Frankenström.

Frankenthumb - With Steve Oedekerk as Pepper, Narrator, Frankenbatthumb, Italian Man (voice).  Also with S. Scott Bullock as Dr. Frankenthumb, Mayor, Minister.  Set Decoration by: Frank Kowal III.

Frankenweenie - With Shelley Duvall as Susan Frankenstein.  Also with Daniel Stern as Ben Frankenstein.  Also with Barret Oliver as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Jason Hervey as Frank Dale.  Re-recording Mixer (as Frank C. Regula): Frank Regula.  Writing Credits... oh, I don't know... MARY SHELLEY???????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Frankenweenie - With Catherine O'Hara as Mrs. Frankenstein.  Also with Martin Short as Mr. Frankenstein.  Also with Charlie Tahan as Victor Frankenstein.  Also with Frank Welker as Sparky Frankenstein (voice) (uncredited).  Stereo Artist: Prime Focus World: Francesco Capone.  Stereo Artist: Prime Focus World: Francis David O'Brien

"The Franki Show" - With Bonnie Carter as Franki (unknown episodes)

Frankie - With Lauren Murtagh as Frankie.  Also with Francis Owens as Maddy.

Frankie - With Alvaro Orlando as Frankie. 

Frankie - With Chona Sandoval as Frankie. 

Frankie - With Mathias Ilg as Frankie. 

Frankie - With Diane Kruger as Frankie.  Sound Mixer: François Musy

Frankie - With Frankie G. Foti as Frankie Caldwell. 

Frankie - With Ryan Andrews as Frankie.  Also with Anthony Brophy as Frankie's Dad.

Frankie - With Ean Sheehy as Frankie

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Auteur Watch - William Greaves

Whelp, if nothing else, Mr. Greaves was responsible for one of the greatest titles in recent cinematic history: Symbiopsychotaxiplasm.  Sure, arguably not as cool as Stan Brakhage's classic Pneumonoultramicroscopic-silicovolcanocoliosis or perhaps even as wordy as one of Henry Jaglom's early efforts entitled... I think it was Antidisestablishmentarianism.  Probably.  This was when he used to leave the house to make a movie, of course.  What's the point now? 
Oh, but Greaves was only beginning to rock the world of the documentary...

A Handle on the Moment

Another missed deadline.  This is why I never get anywhere, either in life or in my career.  But another box office has come and gone already, and is it just me or is the fare getting a little more violent these days?  I'm a pretty regular user of the IMDb, and these violent yet strangely seductive ads for a Heathers reboot on something calling itself "The Paramount Network" is/am/are/was/were all over the place... they're not trying to make cannibalism sexy, are they?  Then there's this other thing called ... nope, forgot the title already, but it's one of Anton Yelchin's last last movies.  Hollywood lags behind the working dead like that sometimes... John Candy, for example, only when you get a death like John Candy's, a fight breaks out over which one is his last last movie.  Haven't seen the likes of that for a while.  Thoroughbreds, that's it!  A pretty strongly advertised first feature from someone making a debut of sorts on the world stage!  Then we've got this week's top debut at the Box Office: Jason Bateman's Latest... I mean, it's called Game Night.  And with returns like this it will no doubt spawn a few sequels, probably a Netflix / Amazon spin-off / prequel series or two, maybe a couple co-branding deals with Milton Bradley, Hasbro and or the Parker Brothers.  And of course, whoever's behind that douche-y Cranium game.  That's the best one.  Cards Against Humanity hasn't gone mainstream yet... at least, not that mainstream.  All the cool people know and love it, of course.  A little bloodshed; that's all they want out of their entertainment.
Meanwhile, in second place, it's something called Annihilation.  Again with the promise of bloodshed!  Almost makes me wish that Kirk Cameron was making a sequel to Saving Christmas.  Sure, it would be ridiculous as a February release, but man!  Gimme one glimmer of hope here!  Anyway, Annihilation is the story of a wife whose husband goes missing, so she has to go looking for him, and... oh, I've probably given away too much already.  So does the plot description.  For those of you cynics out there like me, it's also the story of Natalie Portman not having the strength of a franchise like Resident Evil or Underworld to fall back upon in, especially in the lean times like this.  Ouch!
And finally, debuting at the wrong end of the box office, it's something called Every Day.  Here's the one-line plot description: "A shy teenager falls for someone who transforms into another person every day."  Now, sure, you're thinking Groundhog Day or 50 First Dates or something like that, and why couldn't this be as popular as those movies were... on the other hand, people forget their high school years sometimes.  Ever find yourself hanging with the wrong people?  Or seeking out people that didn't seem as boring as the people in the Chess Club?  All while trying to manage your own internal turmoil... exciting times!  Not to mention finding either a) yourself having to move because of the Army or because of the nature of your parents' douche-y corporate jobs, or b) your best friend under those circumstances.  I think that's what the filmmakers were going after, but also trying to siphon off of the magic of The Spectacular Now... the good parts, not all that boring stuff where even the people in the focus groups fell asleep.  A little emotional bloodshed; that's all they want out of their nonfiction-based entertainment...
Which brings me in a roundabout way to this week's civil rights march.  I'm going to pick up a couple of scraps that "The Daily Show" left for me, because it seems that the NRA is losing some of its hard-fought institutional "rights"... maybe more like perks or privileges.  See, there were a bunch of companies that would give NRA members certain discounts on services and what not.  Airlines, for one.  But they showed a picture of a bunch of corporate logos, and I couldn't help but notice a large amount of car rental companies that gave such NRA discounts.  Makes me think of that line about "speedy trials," for some reason.  Because NRA members deserve to have a speedy getaway car that's practically untraceable.  Just be careful with it; don't get stupid on us.  Don't leave fingerprints or spatters of blood after using our rental cars or anything, please.  Unfortunately, the Parkland students have to go back to their lives to try and rebuild.  They're heading back to school, which the people over at Fox News are surely relieved about.  They don't care for high school students that achieve national celebrity in general, but especially not ones fighting against the Second Amendment.  As for me, I'm doing my part by posting cinematic images of gun nuts in movies going off the rails.  This first one, of course, is from what is perhaps Todd Solondz's masterpiece, Happiness... although you might not know it from the composed music.  This is, of course, from a dream sequence, being described to a psychologist, no less!  I was pleasantly surprised that my local hippie-esque video store even had it; I don't get to drive to Seattle as much as I used to... well, I used to live in Seattle, but that was a different era completely.  DVDs were still being made, even VHS was still available to an extent in stores.  Oh, but there I go again!  Glennis would have to leave me... That's my new favorite line this year.

Sunday, February 18, 2018

Auteur Watch - F. Gary Gray

I've probably said/blogged this before, but you hang around long enough, even in a shark-infested swamp like Hollywood, learn to play the game a little... and BOOM!  You get the coveted job of directing a "Fast and Furious" sequel.  Forgive me... Fast and Furious.  Didn't John Singleton do one of those?  ...why, yes he did!  Thanks, IMDb!  Of course, having a debut like Friday under your belt doesn't exactly hurt, either.  Keep the star happy, keep the producers happy... that's basically the game, and probably its name as well.  Then you can go be an artist.  Once you have enough hits.  Like Spielberg!  Of course, every film a director does is a work of art... even the ones with Marky Mark, I suppose.  But after all the music videos he did, I suppose Be Cool was his little jab at it.  Just a light, loving jab in case he ever has to go back.  I'm sure Elmore Leonard knows more about music videos than F. Gary Gray, but still, I suppose another point of view doesn't hurt.  Or maybe David Fincher was unavailable.
But if his IMDb birthday is to be believed, Mr. Gray is dangerously close to the not-so-nifty age of 50.  Just ask Bowfinger! ...damn my lack of HTML experience.  Note to self: make a billion damn dollars by creating a special HTML tag that says, like... you know, # Go To the Word "Smell".  Ah, who'm I kidding?  Those billionaires keep it all to theyselves.  On the upside, not all these CEOs can afford to give themselves one dollar a year!
And so, Mr. Gray has had two big hits back-to-back: Straight Outta Compton and The Fate of the Furious.  Surely there's one more title to make this a trilogy, you're asking?  Well, the answer is yes, I just found out!  Thanks again, IMDb!  I'm so glad I didn't have to invent you myself... most of the time.  Damn, can't find it.  Never mind.  Anyway, hope he likes sequels and/or spin-offs!  The Powers that Be are firing up a Men in Black spinoff, and Mr. Gray gets to do the first one.  We don't have any cast information yet, but he's probably not too much in control of that.  As long as you come in under budget, ahead of schedule, don't get tired of the Green Screen room, and are able to say it was either like a Clint Eastwood set or a Coen brothers set... you'll do/be just fine.  Do/Be?  Doo-be-doobie doo!  Boy, I hope I don't have that Superflu.  That's one of the signs.  Sorry, Boss, might be calling in sick tomorrow.

(ten minutes later) ...HAH!  Found it.  Oh boy, fresh ravings.  I mean, check THIS guy out!  Either he's the Highlander or... nah, can't be it.  But it could be!  I mean, the Powers that Be that run the IMDb clearly have bigger fish to fry.  I submitted a work ticket for this guy, but still nothing.  Too much of a pain to fix, apparently.  But look at this guy's résumé!  I mean, LOOK AT IT!!!!!!!!  A hundred years old and he's now a sound recordist?  Dang.  Strong union!  Or maybe he's got motel pictures on someone.