Abar, The First Black Superman - ...OH MY GOD! Dr. Kincade's actually Dr. BEN CARSON!!!!!!!!!!
The Buddy System - This seems like the kind of movie that Roger Ebert probably hated ... you know, kind of like Two of a Kind.
By the Sea - Good double bill with... Paradise. Yes, I'm that old.
Catwoman - Warner Bros. just tweeted "We were Halle Berry's 'Knight in Shining Armor' until it ends... then we became the worst movie studio in history."
Deadpool - Yahoo! News tells me that this will be 'filthy, comical, hyper-violent fun.' All I know is, Ryan Reynolds needs a hit... at the box office, that is. Also, he doesn't seem to be having fun as a movie star. I mean, he took everyone's advice in the Quantum Mechanics program at Harvard and became a movie star instead, because everyone always told him his whole life that he had movie star looks and what not... so now he's a movie star. Now what, guys? And why isn't it working out? Why, Quantum Mechanics program at Harvard? And don't tell me it's one of those unknowable things because electrons move too fast to be exactly pinpointed...
The Dead Pool - Dirty Harry's Class Struggle in Beverly Hills
5 Flights Up - ...oh, I LOVE that band! "Living in London," "Away From the Sun"... good times. Good times, cold beers, great tunes.
Her - I wonder who feels more ripped off: Charlie Kaufman, or Strange Days?
In the Mouth of Madness - ...I'm sorry, I mean John Carpenter's In the Mouth of Madness. Hey, John Carpenter. John Landis called; he wants his font back. (opening credits) Judging from the plot description, this must be Carpenter's revenge against Stephen King or something.
Kingsman: The Secret Service - ...sorry, I always do this. We only previewed it tonight, so I can't comment on the film as a whole. Also, I can't badmouth it too much, as it wasn't my pick... but here's my question. Now, I love to see the bullies get a beating as much as anyone else. My question is this. If you're a bully, and you've just been... no, YOU and the five guys you're with, you've all just been beaten about nine-tenths of the way to death by an acquaintance of someone you're picking on... do you a) lay off that person for a long while, if not forever, or b) do you seek them out right away? Well, in this movie, the answer is b). I guess the job market's a little tougher out there than I thought! Clearly I don't stand a chance.
Love the Coopers - Maybe on DVD... okay, maybe on cable in four months
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 - Just saw the trailer! Well, enough of it.
My Brother The Pig - Let's hope he never meets Leon the Pig Farmer! Oink oink oink...
Naked Fear - I know some directors like to work with unknowns, but... THE WHOLE CAST?!!!!!
The Night Before (2015) - First of all, there's only ONE The Night Before... what's the deal with Seth Rogen remaking all these '80s films? Neighbors, this,...
Off Beat - Speaking of off beat, how about Judge Reinhold in this music video, at his wide-eyed, lovestruck best? Now THAT'S off beat!
Il Piccolo Diavolo - ...boy! And Walter Matthau thought working with Robin Williams was bad!
The Pirates of Penzance - Best musical from the 1950s... second only to Gypsy, of course
"Serial, Season One" on Pandora - ...boy! That was quick. Remember the good old days when you just used Pandora to play songs? Pandora. Because how quickly you go from just playing songs to producing TV shows matters.
Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone - ...oh, wait, it's just a Thompson Twins video. Looks like the same place they filmed it, though! I guess Spacehunter: Adventures in the Industrial District wasn't a cinematic enough title. Plus, they didn't want to keep it a hundred and call it Spacehunter: We Blew the Whole Budget on the Costumes.
Spectre - I know it's a lot to ask, but can everyone give this good reviews? I won't get to see it if it doesn't get good reviews...
Time Bandits - Time to start an online petition for a new Blu-Ray transfer ... 4K, 1080p, whatever. Just get it done.
Yoga Hosers - ...I think the list of producers is longer than the cast! How's that work? Twice as long if you count all the "PGA"s after every producer's name now. What's that all about? I still don't get it. ...oh, I know, it's probably part of that disastrous "Citizens United" decision.