Sunday, November 05, 2017

Auteur Watch - Conrad Glover

How to handle an auteur and former Hollywood actor that no one seems to want to take credit for like Conrad Glover?  (Credit 1, Credit 2)  Well, for some reason, the Muse struck me... that's right, critics have Muses as well... that the way to approach this is to take a closer look at the Conrad Glover Rolling Stock Company of actors that appear in Conrad Glover joints films.  Take this one guy that's appeared in all five!  Named Conrad Glover... oh, right.  We'll skip that one for now.  Well, the hands-on favourite champ, other than Conrad, has got to be Nicholl Jones.  For one thing, she's got a head shot.  Not all these actors do, even though it's been an IMDb feature for some time now.  But she's got to be the big star of the Conrad Glover Rolling Stock Company that everyone else is jealous of.  I mean, she's the Maya of "Maya's Soul" fame, for God's sake!  That's not nothing, is it?  So, what was it about Twists of Fate that made her drop out of the Conrad Glover Rolling Stock Company?  Was she so busy?  Samuel L. Jackson always finds a way to clear his schedule for Quentin Tarantino!  Maybe it was the co-director part that she had trouble with.  But Conrad didn't want to be without a Nicholl, so Michelle Nicolle had to suffice.
Then, of course, there's Ricky Velez... oops, I was thinking of "The Nightly Show."  Sorry.  Sigh... I miss that show.  I'm telling you; Trump made a call, and boom.  Gets cancelled.  The NSA knows it's true.  I mean, Jaime Velez.  I love Jaime Velez... those of you who speak French understand.  Similar deal, four pics under Glover's helm.  But not Twists of Fate!  What's the dilly-o here, anyway?  Can't figure it out.  No casting director credited on Twists, so... hmm.  Maybe that was part of the problem.
But I think I know what happened, after a little more considerable data anaylsis... alanyssi?  Something like that.  The more I type, the more esoteric my typos get.  There seems to be ONE person that appeared in Fate and in a non-Fate based title.  And that person is... Ray Bolger... no, that can't be right.  Ray Bolger died in 1987!  ToF has a release year of 2009!  Either Ray Bolger pulled some next-level Tupac type sh... stuff here, or I got the name wrong.  Okay, I know what happened.  Rick Borgia.  The more I type, the more esoteric my name mistakes get.  That's just all there is to it.  Anyway, this Rick Borgia was also Fate's producer... and an executive one, at that!  He probably acted as an uncredited casting director... executive producers always do.  It's like how Steve(n) Mnuchin has a thing for Ben AffleckThe Accountant, Batman v. Superman... the titles probably go on and on.  Anyway, so Rick told Conrad Glover point blank, and said "I've seen your other films.  They're good!  That being said, YOU'RE NOT CASTING YOUR USUAL LOT OF LOSERS IN MY MOVIE.  Twists of Fate IS MY MOVIE, AND YOU... AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO F... mess it up."  Something like that.  Hence the extra Borgias in the cast.  Rick wanted his usual lot of losers in the movie instead.  But hey!  It's just the jealousy talking.  Can't argue with results.  Borgia brought on a second director, and now Conrad's out of the biz completely... actually, the co-director's not doing too well either.  Guess the experience wasn't all rose petals falling onto the bed... oh, right, probably can't reference that anymore. 
But I was curious about one part of the casting.  There's one Jamie Mattus credited as "Goon"... and probably not the whimsical "Goon Show" that influenced Monty Python, I'm thinking.  But there's also one Jamie Mattus credited as Billy's Crew #1!  And he does watch movies about gladiators... ick.  Now, I know it's asking a lot, because the IMDb doesn't easily rectify mistakes... or maybe this is the greatest bit of one actor playing two different roles since Jeremy Irons in Dead Ringers or Tom Hardy in Legend.  Of course, if that were the case, someone probably would've put a link to an external review.  As of this writing... none.  I'd even settle for a Deadfall-type deal with someone trying for a Nicolas Cage-type deal of chewing the scenery so hard it spits itself out!  He did win the Oscar two years later, if anyone cares.  Not me; I gotta move on to my next big disappointment.  No time.

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