Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Auteur Watch - Alan Rudolph

I'm sorry, but I've got to put my foot down. If you've got a foot, you've just got to put it down, and down here is where mine is going to be put. I'm sure Alan Rudolph is a nice guy and all, but he's got to go. Seriously, he's got to be drummed out of the DGA right along with Eric Schaeffer and Matthew Meshekoff.
AND the guy who directed 1981's Tattoo. What's his name? Bob Brooks... okay, looks like he already took care of that. Never mind.
But back to Mr. Rudolph. He's at least got one film so far that he'll be remembered for, and that, of course, is Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle. And I'm starting to wonder about that one! No, it's still good. But THAT'S IT! Like with most normal people, Kevin Smith's got Clerks 1, Spike Lee's got Do The Right Thing, and M. Night Shyamalan's got The Sixth Sense. Some directors just end up with one film that way.
The son of director Oscar Rudolph, Alan was born in the industry's backyard on December 18th, 1943. Fortunately, Alan wouldn't be consigned to the TV directing ghetto like dear old dad. Yes, no matter how you slice it and dice it, Alan's a director only a film critic could love.
Oh yeah! Almost forgot. So, what's Mr. Rudolph's favorite career decade? Perhaps it's the go-go 60s, when he was just starting out, assistant directing for the likes of Buzz Kulik and Alex March? Or perhaps the go-go 70s, when he assistant directed for Robert Altman? Oh, a screenwriter can surely become king with a little luck and nepotism beneath his wings!
Perhaps the 80s. Alan weathered the ravages of the Me Decade with some under-the-radar writer-director numbers. But it was the 90s that would bring upon him much unwelcome attention. First with 1991's Mortal Thoughts starring Die Hard star Bruce Willis and Mrs. Bruce Willis, Demi Moore. And second with the Mrs. Parker thingie. Finally! Some damn recognition! Or perhaps it was the 2000s, when he took that recognition and cashed it in to make The Secret Lives of Dentists. See, I have a problem with this movie. Apparently, Denis Leary calls someone a lousy dentist, and they don't call him a lousy comedian right back. A movie's gotta have a certain amount of credibility in my book.
But he's got something on the front burner. Something called Blind Spot. That'll probably be in the 2010s, which will probably be his favorite decade of all. I'm so depressed...

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