Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Short Reviews - June 2014
Blended - Adam Sandler apparently doesn't want to go back to SNL to host.... bawk bawk bawk bawk!
The Blair Witch Project - Four profane filmmakers get lost in the woods. They should've called it Def Filmmaker Jam.
Deal - Well, I hope you're happy, filmmakers! Now I'm no poker buff, but my friend is, and he felt betrayed. Satisfied? Hey, the next time you make a film about poker... SHOW THE HANDS! SHOW THE HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
House of Cards, Season 2 - Oh, will June the 17th never come?
White Nights - I guess no one likes this movie right now.............
Happy-Go-Nutty - I don't get it. What does Katharine Hepburn have to do with this loony, loony Screwy Squirrel cartoon? Did she play the gates of Moron Manor or something? I never thought I'd be coming to her defense like this and all. Strange times we live in.
The Bellboy - Here's how memory works... well, my memory, anywho. So we were just watching this old Twilight Zone episode, brought to you by Chesterfield Cigarettes, of course.
Twilight Zone - Season 3, Episode 25: "The Fugitive" - The character of the mother didn't seem familiar to me...............
Who's Minding the Store? - ...or does she? That's IT! Emily Rothgraber! The stern hunter and seeker of elephant shells! You might know her best as Jane Hathaway from The Beverly Hillbillies. Classic television that I've never seen.
Okay, time for a bold experiment... See if you can guess it.
What's Up, Tiger Lily? - 80 minutes
Take the Money and Run - 85 minutes
Bananas - 82 minutes
Everything You Always Wanted To Know About... - 88 minutes
Sleeper - 89 minutes
Love and Death - 85 minutes
Annie Hall - 93 minutes
Interiors - 93 minutes
Manhattan - 96 minutes
Stardust Memories - 89 minutes
A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy - 88 minutes
Zelig - 79 minutes
Broadway Danny Rose - 84 minutes
The Purple Rose of Cairo - 82 minutes
Hannah and her Sisters - 103 minutes
Radio Days - 88 minutes
September - 82 minutes
Another Woman - 81 minutes
Crimes and Misdemeanors - 104 minutes
Alice - 102 minutes
Shadows and Fog - 85 minutes
Husbands and Wives - 108 minutes
Manhattan Murder Mystery - 104 minutes
Bullets Over Broadway - 98 minutes
Don't Drink the Water - 100 minutes
Mighty Aphrodite - 95 minutes
Everyone Says I Love You - 101 minutes
Deconstructing Harry - 96 minutes
Celebrity - 113 minutes!!!!
Sweet and Lowdown - 95 minutes
Small Time Crooks - 94 minutes
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion - 103 minutes
Hollywood Ending - 112 minutes!!
Anything Else - 108 minutes
Melinda and Melinda - 99 minutes
Match Point - 124 minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Scoop - 96 minutes
Cassandra's Dream - 108 minutes
Vicky Cristina Barcelona - 96 minutes
Whatever Works - 92 minutes
You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger - 98 minutes
Midnight in Paris - 94 minutes
To Rome With Love - 112 minutes
Blue Jasmine - 98 minutes...that's probably enough, right?
Get Smart (2008) - Ah, God, how I love blurry videotape. The blurrier, the better. No wonder Hollywood doesn't use tripods anymore! A little bit of shaky cam, and the blurry videotape can handle it! Also, it helps to differentiate your film from the films of the last century. Like how people now use a zoom lens for no reason. Who knew that the Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie was a trendsetter, cinematographically speaking?
Joe - Nicolas Cage's Mud
The Interview - Kim Jong Un threatens to go to war over latest Seth Rogen / James Franco comedy... publicity achieved!
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes - ...anyone else tired of these apes movies?