Tuesday, January 27, 2015

A Million Little Lies

Welp, it's fitting that the IMDb would say that American Sniper has been out for SIX weeks instead of just three.  It seems that this Chris Kyle was a pathological liar.  But you gotta hand it to him!  Kyle got out of the Army, unlike that fool without a lucrative book deal Pat Tillman.  Tillman was just lucky he didn't run afoul of Chris Kyle, because Kyle would've kicked his ass, too!  Just like Jesse "The Body" Ventura... oh, right.  Apparently, that didn't happen.  See, this is why fact-checking is kinda important.  Journalism 101, people.  Of course, the Army tends to stay away from controversy when it comes to fact-checking.  Where were they when the Swift Boat Veterans for "Truth" were attacking John Kerry?  I guess they thought, well, let's let the free market decide what to do about John Kerry.  And on top of that, there's the absolute horrifying alternate reality where George W. Bush is a one-term president.  Boy!  Who would want to live in that world?  Which reminds me.  Among its crimes against the truth, American Sniper apparently also makes the case that there's a link between Saddam and 9/11.  And when you get right down to it... there is a link, now that I think about it!  It's George W. Bush.  After all, Saddam tried to "kill his daddy," right?  What more of a link do you need?
In other news, the debuts this week are kinda weak, to make a bad pun out of it.  There's something called Project Almanac at #3.  And I thought Chronicle seemed derivative!  I owe it an apology!  But it's always nice to see A Serious Man's Amy Landecker getting work.  She's a sweetie pie. 
At #4 it's the latest Mike Binder-Kevin Costner collaboration called Black or White.  A nice, PG-13 rated romp at the movies.  None of this James Toback Black & White crap.  No sir!  The '90s is over, my friends!  Way way over.
And finally, at #10, it's a film called The Loft.  Well, as someone once said, tis better to have loft and lost than never to have loft at all.  I forget who it was... maybe Wheeler or Woolsey.

No comments: