Saturday, June 13, 2015

The Velociraptor Whisperer

I was going to post a pic from Gorky Park for my Russian homies, but decided to go with this one instead... I forget why.  And if I ever look back on this blog post, years from now, I'll probably still forget why... oh, well.  Better take the risk.  Anyway, it's still 24 hours until we find out how much Jurassic World made.  With the global ad blitz and the tie-ins with Barbasol and what not, I'll be damned if it ain't number one!  I mean, that guy going all Dog Whisperer on the velociraptors?  Oh, dude.  Better use that as the headline...
(Sunday proper) DAYAMN... now THAT's how it's done.  Twenty million more than the latest Avengers movie!  Good payday for somebody!  Not bad for a non-comic book-based movie.  But somehow the moviegoing economy's slightly up, as the 2nd place movie (in this case, Melissa McCarthy in Spy) made $16 million.  Clean and low eight figures!  Nice.  When Avengers 2 came out, the 2nd place movie made only 6 or so.  That's right... I have to find the dark cloud for this silver lining.  If I had a stake in the outcome, I'd keep my mouth shut.
Meanwhile, Love & Mercy debuts on the top 10 at tenth place.  Let me just be the first to call it... Oscar for Paul Dano.  I can only assume for Best Actor.  Oh, this kid's got the bug in his eyes.  I've seen him in interviews, and he thinks just that highly of himself.  He's going to get something!  As for John Cusack, well... clearly the Academy voting bloc is either 1) jealous, or 2) they just have Cusack in their permanent blind spot.  I mean, Tager's got his statue... no love for Alexeev?  I guess that figures in a way.  Gold for the artist, nothing for the slimy businessman... just the Best Picture award.  You get the brass for portraying the kid next door, not for actually being the kid next door.  Incidentally, what about Brian Wilson?  I mean, he's only one of the greatest geniuses in American music of all time, including Cretaceous and Devonian.  WHAT ABOUT HIM??!!!!!  Well, he's got to play the game, like Phil Collins and Peter Gabriel and Paul McCartney.  Oh, and Sting.  Basically, Brian Wilson has to become a Brit somehow.  Don't they have some kind of honorary knighthood or something?  Let's get it done, people!  Let's make that ideal world.  Be the change you wish to see in the world already!

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