Sunday, May 22, 2016

So it begins..................

I was just thinking that, rather than consider the implications of the end of society as we know it through the lens of an Angry Birds movie being #1 at the box office this weekend, I thought instead I'd contemplate some of the implications of this whole Zika virus thing, of which I've only gotten a short briefing on at work and all.  But according to that old web mainstay Wikipedia... which I will donate money to someday, I promise... probably better that they don't take a cash infusion from, say, the Koch brothers or someone like that... warnings are being issued to women in countries such as Colombia, Jamaica and the Dominican Republic to postpone getting pregnant until more is known about the virus!  Meanwhile, in the South, Christian parents keep telling their pregnant daughters "Young lady, you are NOT traveling abroad to try and catch the Zika virus!  You are TAKING THIS BABY TO TERM RIGHT NOW!!!!!!"  I guess what I'm getting at, in my usual oblique manner, is that some said that AIDS was God's will when it made its big debut in the 80s.  Punishment for sexual promiscuity, something like that.  But now God is going after the institution of pregnancy?  Make up your mind, God!  Make up your mind.  Are we multiplying too much again?  Is it time for another flood?  Of course, the next ark will probably be a little less full, given the rate at which humanity is killing off species.
Anyway, back to Le Cinema.  Personally, I'm waiting for that "Candy Crush" movie that Stephen Colbert promised me, but for now, Angry Birds will just have to do.  Ooh!  What nod to the game that started it all will there be?  Opening credits montage?  Closing credits?  Smartphone footage of people in the mall hitting each other?  For Hollywood proper, it's just another day at the office, not having to put on layer after layer of makeup, as the actors always say.  Oh, it's great!  I come in to the studio in my PJs and talk into a mic all day!  Love it.  But will America love it next week, or will they have second thoughts?  Something tells me from the totals that Captain America will take back over again.

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