Sunday, October 16, 2016

A Cruel Basis of Accounting

...love that joke.  Well, as the TV ad campaign predicted, Ben Affleck's latest, The Accountant, opens at #1... didn't Clooney make this movie in 2010?  Anyway, Ben's made 24.7 million dollars its first weekend... but it cost 30 million to promote on the TV!  I guess the average moviegoer decided to go with either a) H&R Block or b) QuickBooks.  You know how it is these days.  No one wants to leave the comfort of their cheap gin and the telescreen... HD telescreen, to be fair.
The only other debut this week is the latest Kevin Hart concert film, so let's just take a look back at the week that was.  Emily Blunt apparently did so-so on SNL last night... which, in a way, is consistent with her career.  Her movie slips from 1 to 3, the new Magnificent Seven is actually at #7, and a movie called Middle School: The Worst Years of my Life is having a terrible time at the box office as well.  Besides, wasn't it Bart Simpson who said "This is the worst day of my life," to which Homer replied, "The worst day of your life SO FAR!"  And even though The Birth of a Nation (2016) is at #10 and about to leave, and the director slash star has some Trump-type sexual allegations in his past, well... what do you think?  An Oscar sweep?  Of course, it'll either have to sweep the actor awards like The Piano, or the technical awards like Schindler's List.  Can't have both, or so it would seem.
And finally, at #2 is Kevin Hart: What Now?  ...what now, he asks?  I'll tell you what now.  Stay on the path!  Don't repeat Eddie Murphy's mistakes!  Wake up every day and thank God you're alive!  Play the romantic lead for as long as you can, man!  Of course, it's different than in Cary Grant's day. Playing the lead at 55 in North by Northwest ain't too shabby.  But according to Mel Brooks, he would eat a hard boiled egg for lunch.  Maybe that's the fountain of youth after all!

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