Ransom Riggs. No, seriously, what's his real name? And will his bitter rivalry with Daniel Handler ever lose the interest of the press?
Now, to help boost publicity for his latest, Tim Burton gave a weird answer to someone's question... let's move on. At #2 is something called Deepwater Horizon. On the one hand, it's a gripping dramatization of the worst oil spill in human history which happened in April 2010. On the other, it stars Mark Wahlberg and was directed by Peter Berg, so you can bet that it's going to go pretty easy on the oil companies.
At #6, it's the 1976 Zero Mostel classic Mastermind... I'm sorry, it's the 1997 Patrick Stewart masterpiece, Masterminds... I'm sorry, it's the 2003 TV series "Masterminds"... Forgive me, I must be distracted. It's the 2016 theatrical release, Richard Lowry's Masterminds... Jared Hess's Masterminds and... dayamn! No wonder everyone was upset by the new Ghostbusters. The cast of the new Ghostbusters is all practically in this thing! How committed could they be to the remake of the beloved 1984 classic if they're too busy galavanting about in some other cinematic masterpiece of the same year? I was going to point out that, on top of all that, it's just a remake of the 1949 Bowery Boys classic Master Minds but I'm just too flustered to go on like this. Far far too flustered. What a long week it's been.
And finally, giant megacorporation sucking the last bit of life left from the landscape, Disney, engages in a little cultural diversity, if only for tax purposes. It's called Queen of Katwe starring Madina Nalwanga as the titular queen who learns how to play chess, and I'm assuming becomes a prodigy over the course of the film. You know, it wasn't so long ago that Disney was considering making King of Mancala starring Josh Duhamel in the lead. But time is finite, and there are only so many projects one person can do... wonder if Miles Teller's too busy to do it instead.