Sunday, July 30, 2017

A Bridge Too Far, or Scaramucci, Scaramucci, Will You Do the Fandango?

I kinda figured that Dunkirk would be #1 for a second week.  A third?  Probably not.  I mean, The Dark Tower is out next week!  Can't go wrong with Stephen King... Atomic Blonde did better than I expected.  I thought it would only take in, like, 10 million dollars or something.  But stopping by "The Daily Show" to flog your wares is still a good thing.  Who's got time to read so many books?  I mean, besides Terry Gross.  Hmm!  Wonder if Bill O'Reilly is still obsessed with her.  Or is it just because she's on NPR, which receives a sliver of government funding.  You know... A BAD THING.  He wants value for his hard-earned tax dollar!
But the latest sign of technological narcissism debuted at #2 this week, and it's called The Emoji Movie.  Oh sure, it's a personal and professional triumph for Disney-DreamWorks veteran Tony Leondis and all that, don't get me wrong... but maybe there's some hope for society after all.  And did you have to turn your phone off while the movie was playing, incidentally?  See, if they were real good, they'd try to do a William Castle-type deal and have buzzers under the seats... I mean, make the movie some kind of interactive experience.  When, say, the eggplant emoji comes on and has his or her big Oscar(TM) speech, POP!  You get one on your SmartPhone screen!  Shi... Stuff like that.  And I gotta say... they really cleaned up the Poop Emoji, so to speak... okay, bad choice of words.  It looks more like a dollop of Costco(TM) frozen yogurt than what it's supposed to be.

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