All right, let's crank this out. I've procrastinated long enough... again! Kinda looks like David Morse, don't he? Well, fortunately ol' Joe Carnahan got to quit his day job as Morse's stand-in on such features as Inside Moves and 16 Blocks. He's a big-shot director now! He doesn't have to take anybody's crap anymore. No, we all have to take his, as a matter of fact! That's how big the man is.
Starting off as writer of such indie circuit hits as Taco Heaven and Karate Raider, he hit it big with his homage to Guy Ritchie called Blood Guts Bullets and Octane. Something like that. Fortunately, Ritchie dropped his lawsuit and Carney was able to settle into a nice, less luminous directing career, with such cop dramas as Narc and Pride and Glory, which he just wrote. He struck gold again with Smokin' Aces, and is soon to strike direct-to-video gold with the sequel. Let's hope Piven's mercury poisoning clears up so he can participate, huh? Did he actually get killed in the first one? I don't know. But if Carney's as good of a screenwriter as I think he is, he'll be able to write him back from the dead. An Otto Preminger remake is next for Joe, called Bunny Lake is Missing. Might be lucky! I gotta go...
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