Sunday, December 28, 2008

The last Box Office of 2008 ... HEY! Stop strangling that kid!!!

I was about to say 'Poor Jen' again, but man! The dark side finally emerges. And the timing couldn't of been worse, with Marley & Me at #1 with the biggest take at the Christmas box office. Who knew? Shades of 1990 all over again? But at least Home Alone was a Christmas movie. What's Marley's Christmas message? Become a lame columnist by using the lemons your untrained dog turns into lemonade?
Speaking of which, Adam Sandler's Winter 2008 pic, Bedtime Stories, kicks 2nd place ass at #2 with about 9 million short of #1. I TOLD you you shoulda had Copy Guy in the movie with you! People just love him, and he makes you look better. Now if Adsy were doin' Marley & Me, there would be an obligatory cameo from Cesar Millan, begging for Adam's dog training secrets on the phone. Alas, it's not meant to be because Marley & Me's a TRUE story, not a bedtime story. Oh well. Nobody's perfect. We can't all be paid to daydream.
Meanwhile at #3 it's Chad Schmidt's Benjy Button. Well, Jen has won the box office battle, but I still think Brad's winning the war. Poor Jen. And as if all that's not enough backstory to this week's Box Office Slugfest, Tom Cruise's 2008 entry bobs up out of the water at #4. And I think we all know what that means! Time for Cruise to appear in Magnolia 2: Mackey's Back!
Rounding out the top 5 is yesterday's news, Yes Man. Face it, Emily: in the Hollywood SATs, you are to Meg Tilly what Zooey is to Jennifer.
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So we got FOUR newbies in the top 5. That's some kinda record! But fear not, for we have two newbies in the lower half of this week's top 10: Doubt & The Spirit. Oh, that's my only prediction for this week that turned out right: The Spirit at 4 or lower! And I totally missed the boat on the dog movie! ...Okay, that does it. I usually let these phony links lie, but I have to address this. I don't know who your agent is, Jim Belushi... Maybe you're your own agent at this point, but you never... NEVER do the direct to video sequel! Look at the Addams Family direct-to-video sequel. Did Anjelica Huston come back for that? HELL NO! ...on the other hand, Carel Struycken came back to reprise his role. Okay, never mind. I was wrong.
Over 'n out.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I saw that you mentioned the straight to video Addam's Family sequel. People have been telling me that I should see it because it's so-bad-it's-good but I'm worried it might just be plain old bad.

To watch, or not to watch?

-Jenney @ Branch 79

The Movie Hooligan said...

Hey! I remember you. How's things down at ol' Br. 79? Coby still swamped? I'd be curious just to see how Daryl Hannah does trying to fill Anjelica Huston's mighty big shoes. I say, if you're feeling adventurous and you got some free time, go for it. Otherwise, maybe just watch the original or the sequel if it's been a while.
As for the rising tide of SBIG cinema, makes you realize how we need Mystery Science Theater 3000 more than ever these days. BTW, Krakatoa is actually WEST of Java... ;)