All I can say is, in the Movie SATs, what Michael Bay is to Transformers, Todd Phillips now is for The Hangover. There's just no doubt about that anymore. The numbers don't lie. It made almost as much as Pirates 4, for God's sake! Now THAT'S Legendary! Not this Observe and Report crap... as for Bradley Cooper, Renee Zellweger must be leaving a hundred messages on his phone machine, or in his voice mail mailbox. Damn, I'm so techno-Left Behind. Will I ever make it to the e-Promised Land, wherever that is?
I just have to move on now, and quickly. Of the four sequels in the Top 10 this week, at #2 is Kung Fu Panda part 2. The magic is back! We can't see how old Jack Black is getting if he's animated! That should be the next thing in these Pixar characters: they age before our eyes. Well, Cars 2 is probably not going to risk that; besides, how do you make a car look older? It's impossible!
The other debut this week is Midnight in Paris, or Woody Allen part 47, so really, there's five sequels in the Top 10 this week. Man, I can't remember the last time ol' Woody cracked the top 10, do you? Not even with his smoldering Match Point; think Crimes and Misdemeanors, given the Allen Habel Big Picture treatment. Make the Judah character a hot twenty-something! As Robert de Niro said in Mistress, people go to the movies to be titillated by sex. And with that, I move swiftly on to this week's auteurs.