Wednesday, March 12, 2014

The BIG JULES WHITE (3 films remain)

Our next Stooge short is an awful one called Husbands Beware.  It features stock footage from the classic Brideless Groom.  Might as well remake the best, right?  Kinda reminds me of when Jackie Gleason went back on TV in the '70s and did Honeymooners-esque sketches.  The wives he used in those bits remind me of the wives here.
On the other hand, the Stooges finally get the on-screen wives they deserve!  As Moe helpfully explains, he and Larry marry Shemp's overweight sisters at the beginning of the pic.  Kinda reminds me of the setup of Twice Two, but never mind.  After the ink's dry on the marriage licenses, the two girls punch their husbands in the head, then command them to get dinner ready.  "We don't know how to cook!" exclaims an exasperated Larry.  "It's time you learned!" says his bride.  Eventually, Shemp helps out in the kitchen out of solidarity.  In a way, this film preps us for the Shemp-less films to come. :(
Anyway, it's too late to put this delicately, but needles to say the Stooges served the wrong people their disastrous cooking.  The brides of Moe and Larry throw them out of the apartment into the hall, as well as Shemp, and each of the Stooges has a concussion-inducing date with the wall opposite the apartment.  But how to link this seemingly unrelated story to Brideless Groom?  Screenwriters take note: watch true masters at work.  Shemp declares that he'll never get married.  Moe swears revenge, and Larry looks at his watch and says "Hey Shemp!  We gotta give a music lesson!"  Connection complete.  You can barely see the jagged scar.
If nothing else, they have my favourite moment from Brideless Groom: the big final note by Dee Green.  And of course, poor Christine McIntyre has to fawn over Shemp extra hard in this one.  Now that's acting!  But don't worry, folks.  The Stooges are professionals and they've decided to add slightly new footage to the proceedings.  They add a rather cruel twist to the plot of Brideless Groom, but remain gentlemen during the chaos that ensues when all the women that Shemp proposed to find out about the economic incentive involved.  Anyway, I've got to enjoy these before I get into the Joe Besser years.

-so sayeth The Movie Hooligan

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